Shit in my Angry Chair

So on Friday I went to a local theater to see a double-feature of Nightmare On Elm Street and Candyman. I’m cool like that. My friend that was supposed to go with me couldn’t escape a work engagement so I went on my own, knowing I would meet a couple of friends when I got there. Nightmare On Elm Street starts and for some reason I go from zero to pissy in about six seconds. Hand nothing to do with the movie (which I love) it had to do with some people in the audience, who would not stop giggling. I get that the movie is old and a little dated, but it’s not FUNNY (okay, Johnny Depp getting blended to death is, but that’s really about it).

Still, while their non-stop giggling was annoying, I was far more annoyed with it than I should have been. This was on me not them. The movie ends and it’s time for intermission. I go out to talk to my friends about next week’s double-feature which is the Italian horror classic Zombi and the amazing 1987 Kathyrn Bigelow vampire flick Near Dark. I’m trying to sell Near Dark to my skeptic friends who haven’t seen it, playing up the awesomeness of Bill Paxton using a decapitated head to go bowling. One of them says “I loved him in Independence Day!”

“That’s Bill Pullman,” I say, correcting them. I’ve never understood the confusion between the two and it’s a big pet peeve. Bill Paxton; True Lies, Aliens, Apollo 13, Fragile. Bill Pullman: Independence Day, Lost Highway…and that’s about it. I’m a fan of the Paxton. Another friend, a very very good friend of mine, then says, “Does he eat fruit with the skin still on it in this one?” I’m confused and ask for some elaboration. She says, “You know, like he did in K-Pax.”

“That was Kevin Spacey you fucking retard!” I yell at her. Judging from the reactions to those around me I realize that was a bit harsh. I then realize that I am not being very good company that night and I take off early, skipping Candyman because I’m afraid any inappropriate giggling may end with me hurting someone.

The point of this story is that when you have your own blog you can talk about whatever the fuck you want even if it doesn’t have any relevance to anything else, or even a conclusion.

David Bowie
I’m Afraid Of Americans (V2)
I’m Afraid Of Americans (V3)
I’m Afraid Of Americans (V4)
I’m Afraid Of Americans (V5)
I’m Afraid Of Americans (V6)

My brother’s name is Johnny, ergo I find this song funny. These remixes are from a CD single. V3 features Ice Cube. V5 was remixed by Photek. v6 sucks. But don’t take my word for it, find out yourselves.

Alice In Chains
It Ain’t Like That (Live)
Hate To Feel (Live)

The new Alice In Chains album is actually fucking incredible. William Duvall is a great vocalist, reminiscent of Layne without sounding like a cheap imitation. Buy it. While you do that listen to these classic live Alice In Chains cuts taken from the CD single to Angry Chair.

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11 Responses to “Shit in my Angry Chair”

  1. Ian says:

    For Pullman, throw in "Spaceballs" and "Ruthless People." Otherwise, rant away.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Yep, thats the biggest problem with this planet – other fucking people. Rgds, TF

  3. Megan says:

    Come on, Bill Pullman is obviously best known for his work in Spaceballs.

  4. pup don says:

    I fucking LOVE you! You have no idea how many times I try to get my friends to see a movie that's an underground classic just to have them scoff at me that I'm making them watch one of my "weird movies". But I have to tell you, I was at Disneyland over the weekend and there was this goth kid in a top hat, tux jacket with tails, a full outfit, really cool lookin', had to be around 16, 17 or so. I walk past him and he's yelling at a friend of his "Drop Dead Fred… it has Rick Mayall in it, you know from The Young Ones… What do you MEAN you DON'T KNOW who RICK MAYALL is????" And I thought, aaah, there IS sill hope for the future. 🙂

  5. Fuck. Spaceballs. I'm an idiot!

  6. Anonymous says:

    This is why I never watch movies with other people. Because they suck.

    Love I'm Afraid of Americans, but really hated all the remixes barring the first NIN one.

  7. Neil Cake says:

    wow, I was thinking about Drop Dead Fred just yesterday…

  8. Thin says:

    Know how you feel, but spot on. You go to the cinema to watch a film, not smootch, eat, or talk come back the ruthless usher.

    Grreat blog

  9. Perplexio says:

    Oh and for Pullman throw in The Serpent and the Rainbow

  10. ahhh, that's what happened that night. lunch this week?

  11. Blendr says:

    Another Bill Pullman movie, playing against his wholesome type: "The Last Seduction," with Linda Fiorentino and Peter Berg, too. As I recall, things do not end well for old Bill…

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