Depeche Chiefs (Kaiser Mode)

See below for rant(s).

Depeche Mode
Strangelove (Pain Mix)
Pain? You wanna experience pain? Real pain? Pain that grabs you at your soul and tears your will to live apart? Check out Hilary Duff’s new song “Reach Out” samples fucking completely rips off Depeche Mode’s “Personal Jesus.”

This shit pissed me off for all kinds of reasons. First of all, it’s a new track from her “Greatest Hits” collection. Now, when someone releases a “Greatest Hits” collection that usually means they have a large body of work from which to draw from. Hilary Duff has released three albums, that’s it. Just three shitty little albums (four if you count her Christmas record). Not only that, this is her third “Greatest Hits” album! What the fuck? How does that happen? I get that kids like her because of that Disney shit, but how fucking stupid/rich can pre-teen girls be? Also, doesn’t “Greatest Hits” imply that she’s had hit singles? How many hits has Hilary Duff had outside of Radio Disney?

Now, for the song itself…look, I have nothing against sampling, I even have nothing against songs that are built entirely off a sample of another. I loved Rihanna’s “Shut Up And Drive” which was based on Orgy’s cover of “Blue Monday,” TuPac’s “Changes” (samples “The Way It Is” by Bruce Hornsby) and even that retarded Eric Prydz song that samples Steve Winwood (of course, that might be just because of the video), but this shit is just lazy. It’s like when Jessica Simpson sampled “Jack and Diane” for her shitty song or any fucking song that Samantha Mumba’s released ever. It’s fucking lazy, especially when the song is so well known. It’s like they’re saying, “we can’t write our own hook, so let’s just take someone else’s, and while we’re at it, let’s take their choruses, verses and bridges too. “

And at least Rihanna can sing, TuPac could rap and Prydz can…hire hot girls for a video (just kidding, I like the song for other reasons too). Hilary Duff can’t fucking sing for shit. I hope her producer got a bonus each time he had to use the auto-tuner. Hey Hilary, next time you want to sample a great synthpop song I suggest you “Enjoy the Silence” and shut your no-talent pie hole.

Oh, and that remix of “Strangelove” is from a promo 12”.

Kaiser Chiefs
Sooner Or Later
Never Miss A Beat (Run Hide Survive Remix)
Never Miss A Beat (Cut Copy Remix)
Can’t Say What I Mean (Live at Elland Road)
Never Miss A Beat (Live at Elland Road)
You Want History (Live at Elland Road)
Half The Truth (Live at Elland Road)
Kaiser Chiefs’ new album “Off With Their Heads” is pretty awesome, but there are way too many versions of it. Try to follow me, and pay attention because there will be a test afterwards. The Best Buy version has two exclusive tracks, “Sooner or Later” and “Never Miss A Beat (Run Hide Survive Remix).” Good deal right? Well, sure, but if you like Cut Copy (and if you don’t you’re a fucking idiot) you have to buy the iTunes version to get their remix. Of course, you have to buy the full album, you can’t just get that one track – because that would be, y’know, fucking fair.

But wait, there’s more! In England there’s a deluxe version of the album that includes an 4-track live EP (but none of the other bonus tracks). So, if you really like the Kaiser Chiefs and want everything you have to buy the album three times. Don’t do that, buy it once and then download the tracks you need from above to fill the gaps. This has been The Lost Turntable with an anti-Capitalist Public Service Announcement.

And I found the iTunes exclusive version at Disco Dust. Nice blog. Neat logo.

4 Responses to “Depeche Chiefs (Kaiser Mode)”

  1. Timothy Barrington-Smythe says:

    Fuck Hilary Duff. I mean seriously, I would. The girl is hot and has an amazing ass. But as a Depeche Mode fan, FUCK, that is shameless. Be bad enough with just her, but they had some fuckwit RAP on it too. Satan take them now.

    The “Best of Hilary Duff”. What is it? A blank CD?

  2. beketaten says:

    Holy crap…How did they actually lend her the rights to do that?

    UGGHHH…UGGHH. It isn’t even a catchy appropriation, it’s just a second rate dumbassed take-off on the phrase “reach out and touch me”, only without any of the pithy social commentary and a melody that isn’t as good as the original.

    She’s fuckin’ sexy though. Man. Dumb bitch needs to stop straining her voice, though.

  3. Anonymous says:

    love the hillary duff rant. at least we know that in 10 years noboby will know her, and depeche mode will still be cool.
    pc

  4. hagus says:

    From the other room, my wife (a massive Depeche Mode fan) thought it was an okay mash-up. When I informed her that it is actually Hillary Duff’s new single, she was horrified. In 10 years 100% of pop music will just be pop music from 10 years ago with some new dumb-ass singing over it. I can’t wait until they just start sampling themselves and leave good music alone.

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