The Retarded Covers Post

Quick Note: Reposts request time is over kiddos, so stop asking. I know it sucks having just missed the deadline, but take your complaints to someone that gives a shit.

I’m feeling amazingly unoriginal tonight, so here are a bunch of covers.

The Fever
Glamorous Life
Glamorous Life (Fake Fur Remix)
Glamorous Life (Deepwood Remix)
Never heard of these guys before but they deliver an awesome take on the Prince-written Shelia E. classic. Indie-rock needs to embrace Prince more often. I wanna hear The Arctic Monkeys cover “I Would Die 4 U” and Bloc Party take on “Seven.” It would totally work. These tracks are the b-sides to the band’s single “Ladyfingers.”

Snake River Conspiracy
How Soon Is Now? (Prince Quick Mix’s Craker Beat Pass)
How Soon Is Now? (Prince Quick Mix’s Tripapella)
How Soon Is Now? (Back 2 The Future Club Mix)
Another band I’ve never heard of covering a song they have no right to but somehow pulling it off somehow. the eighty billion remixes of it that came on the 2LP 12” single were a bit much though, these are the highlights. They’re all better than t.A.T.u’s version. Sorry girls, but sometimes Russian lesbianism isn’t enough (I know, I was surprised too!)

Summer Breeze 2000
Type O Negative covered this song and that version scared the hell out of me. This version also terrifies me, but for vastly different reasons. From a 12” single.

The Newlydeads
Cities In Dust
The Newlydeads were formed by Taime Downe of Faster Pussycat fame and were an industiral/goth rock band much like NIN or Marilyn Manson. As I’ve always held a soft spot for Faster Pussycat, I enjoy most of the stuff I’ve heard from The Newlydeads and Taime’s interest in branching out his musical horizons seemed pretty sincere and not just a lame attempt to remain relevant after the death of glam rock. If you can find their debut album I recommend it, it’s where I grabbed this excellent cover of Cities In Dust. I checked what little information I could find about the album and Taime is credited as the lead singer of this song and if that’s the case then the boy wins an award for the all-time best Siouxsie impersonation.

The Leather Nun
Gimme Gimme Gimme (A Man After Midnight)
The gothic sleaze continues! This time it comes from Sweden. The Leather Nun were supposedly Sweden’s answer to ABBA, which is odd when you consider that ABBA was from Sweden. Anyways, this remake of the disco diva’s signature tune was originally released on The Leather Nun’s 1987 album Force Of Habit, and that’s now out of print.

Jacky Dean Foundation
Caravan Of Love (Dance Version)
Jacky Dean (if that is his real name) is a twat for releasing this obvious cash-in on The Housemartins’ surprise success of their 1986 acapella version of this classic tune. This discoesque version came out a year later. It’s surprising level of not-complete-suckness has more to do with the strength of the original song than Jacky’s dance music skills. This is off a 12” single.

Have A Cigar
Remember when The Scissor Sisters covered “Comfortably Numb” as a disco tune and everyone went apeshit? Well, they weren’t the first to take Roger Waters’ dark and disturbing views on the record industry and transform them into club-happy dance tunes, as these 70s disco remakes of two Pink Floyd classics show. I have a feeling these might replace the Landslide remixes as the stupidest tracks ever to appear on this site.

Wait I forgot about Sting’s cover of “Tutti Frutti”…I think that one is still the champion.

4 Responses to “The Retarded Covers Post”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Well I must say your callous, uncaring attitude regarding re-posts is most unsettling. I demand a return for Death Disco12 and GodSavetheQueenDance and make it snappy. Senor GoodVibes.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I find in times of anger and stress, some Pil eases the pain.

  3. The Lost Turntable says:

    Very cute response, you actually made me laugh. And you’re right, Pil does help relieve the pain. I hope you have some because you sure as fuck aren’t getting any from me.

  4. Anonymous says:

    I’m glad I could help brighten your dark world. If you choose not to reward me by re-opening the DeathDisco, so be-it. Knowing I brought some joy and laughter is reward enough. My work here is done.

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