Archive for the ‘remixes’ Category

Forgotten Techno Clapton

Sunday, February 2nd, 2020

TDF
Rip Stop (DJ Pulse 12″Mix)
Rip Stop (DJ Pulse Beatz Mix)
Rip Stop (Shed Science ‘Angelic Uplift’ Remix)
Rip Stop (Shed Science ‘Hard Left’ Remix)
Rip Stop (Rabbit in the Moon’s Creamy, Funkshunal Mix)

I’m not a Clapton guy. I’ve never been. Sure, I dig me “Layla” (the real version, not that acoustic slog) and I can respect “Tears In Heaven” for its intent and meaning even if the song itself is kind of wallpaper to me. And, of course, Cream was a juggernaut of a band. But the whole “Clapton is God” thing? I just never got that.

Maybe it’s because I grew up in a world that already had Jimi Hendrix so I knew what god on guitar actually sounded like. Or maybe it’s just because the Clapton that existed in my formative years was the Clapton that put out adult-contemporary snoozefests like the aforementioned acoustic version of “Layla” or the absolutely hideous “My Father’s Eyes.”

“My Father’s Eyes” is off the album Pilgrim, which was produced by Clapton and Simon Climie, who was best known in the UK for his group Climie Fisher as well as his production and songwriting work for artists like George Michael and Westlife. But Pilgrim was not the first project that Clapton and Climie worked on, but the other kind of flew under the radar at the time unless you were on the look out for it.

In 1997, Clapton teamed up with Climie to form the group T.D.F. and release the album Retail Therapy, a collection of electronic/ambient tunes based around jam sessions by the two.

Strangely, Clapton is entirely uncredited in the album’s liner notes. Instead he goes by the name “X-Sample.” Furthermore, all photos of the group in the liner notes featured them hidden behind motorcycle helmets.

Clapton wasn’t the only 60s rock icon to try and re-invent himself in a somewhat anonymous way in the 1990s to earn hipster points. Before this, Paul McCartney collaborated with Youth on the Fireman project, which was also more electronic and experimental in nature than his previous work. Bowie also briefly toyed with the idea of adopting a pseudonym for his electronic music, releasing one single and performing a secret show as the Tao Jones Index (which is a great name).

But while Bowie and McCartney at least went through the motions of pretending they weren’t involved with their pseudonymous releases, Clapton apparently made no such effort. Every contemporaneous review and news item of the album I can dig up clearly know that X-Sample is Clapton. Here’s an MTV News item announcing the album’s release as Clapton’s “techno album.”

With Clapton’s involvement well-known by the time of the album’s release, reviewers perhaps were a bit pre-judgemental in their assessment, hoping for something a bit more guitar driven and rock in nature, and instead getting a collection of ambient electronic pieces with an occasional drum and bass bent. Retail Therapy was not a well-received record, although most of the reviews tended to fall along the lines of ambivalence than outright disgust,  One article I read referred the album as “not uninteresting,” which is praise that’s so faint it’s transparent. AllMusic retroactively gave the album a sad one-and-a-half star review, but the review itself treats the album more as something that’s forgettable rather than outright terrible, dishing out adjectives like “meandering” and “misguiding.” A review from the Hartford Courant is probably the most negative of the bunch, calling it “middling techno ambient stuff that takes a turn toward sleepy time New Age” but it still seems to lean more on the side of boring than awful.

I think I enjoy T.D.F. more than most of the critics, but even I have to admit that their album is, at best, an uneven piece that’s hard to entirely recommend. The first half of the record is actually pretty good, if you’re like me and dig instrumental rock and/or light electronic music. And there’s the fantastic track “Seven” which mixes drum and bass beats and a B.B. King sample with some honest-to-goodness great guitar playing by Clapton.

But on the second half of the record things really take a dive, with much more meandering, bland guitar work by Clapton. There’s also the absolutely horrendous “What She Wants,” an ear-splittingly atrocious piece mid-90s adult contemporary elephant dung that sounds like something that Savage Garden would’ve tossed int the trash for being too bland. This was the track from the album that was released as a single with a radio edit, so they probably had some degree of hope that it might’ve broken through. It’s a garbage track, for sure, but it’s garbage in the same way that a lot of Top 40 radio was in the mid-to-late 90s music was, so I’m actually surprised it wasn’t a hit.

However, one album highlight does manage to sneak in near the end, the stand-out track “Rip Stop,” which mixes drum and bass beats, vocal samples, and light guitar playing by Clapton. While “What She Wants” was a single for radio play, “Rip Stop” was picked as a single for the clubs, with various 12″ releases seeing the light of day with various remixes. I suspect not a single club DJ even bothered with it, however.

The tracks I’m sharing tonight are from the Japanese CD Single for “Rip Stop.” As you can see from the remix titles, they were able to finagle some relatively big names into remixing the tracks, with two mixes by early drum and bass producer DJ Pulse as well as a one by remix giants Rabbit In The Moon (I have no idea who Shed Science is though).

As a whole, the remixes are good and work to the song’s strengths, mainly the dope beats and overall vibe. Some downplay Clapton’s guitar work to an almost comical effect, with others bring it to the forefront. Of the bunch, I enjoy Rabbit In The Moon’s take on the track the most. It’s hella long, and incorporates a lot of interesting new elements. It also is slow to bring in Clapton’s guitar. The riff doesn’t even make a prominent appearance until about halfway through the song’s 12-minute run time. It’s a good build.

And it’s certainly better than anything else Clapton put out since that song for that pool movie with Tom Cruise.

 

Happy belated New Year – here’s Moby remixing Aerosmith

Sunday, January 12th, 2020

Around New Year’s I was showing a friend some other MP3 blog that shares remixes and b-sides. You know the one.

He agreed with me that it was totally lame that said MP3 blog not only shared tracks that are easily commercially available (sometimes on new vinyl even), but that the person behind the blog couldn’t even be bothered to do their own write-up about said tracks. I mean, it’s one thing to hook up a turntable to a PC, go through the sometimes arduous process of ripping a record to a digital format, cleaning it up, and then sharing it on the internet. It’s another to, let’s say, grab a rightfully forgotten piece of 90s electronica, rip it to a digital format, clean it up, properly tag it, upload it to a server that you paid for, and then write about said rightfully forgotten song.

That shit takes gumption.

Aerosmith
Falling In Love (Is Hard On The Knees) (Butcher Mix)
Falling In Love (Is Hard On The Knees) (Butcher Mix Edit)
Falling In Love (Is Hard On The Knees) (Moby Flawed Mix)
Falling In Love (Is Hard On The Knees) (Moby Fucked Mix)

Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhy.

Okay, first things first, there are four remixes here. The first two are by Joe “The Butcher’ Nicolo, the founder of Ruffhouse Records. They’re good examples of your standard remix. They take the basic structure of the song, mix it up a bit, throw in a few more beats, and add some other dance elements. They’re fine. I mean, they’re as fine as remixes to very sub-standard late-90s Aerosmith track can get, but whatever. They are what they are and they accomplish what they set out to accomplish.

Then, there’s the Moby remixes.

What the fuck.

I’m not surprised that Moby remixed these songs. This isn’t an 808 State/Yes situation. He was doing a lot of remix work for rock artists in the mid-to-late 90s. This was around the same time he did remix work for The Smashing Pumpkins, Soundgarden, Blur, and even Metallica. I’m more surprised with how he remixed them. I don’t think it’s really fair to even call these tracks remixes. I think the only thing he saves from the original versions in his remixes are Tyler’s vocals, and he even cuts and screws them to an (even more) unintelligible mess. These are less remixes and more like entirely new productions that just happen feature vocals by Steven Tyler with some short snippets of Perry’s guitar. They remind me Moby’s “Next To The E” or some of the more hardcore remixes of “Go.”

To be perfectly honest, I really don’t know what to think of them. I respect that they’re just so far out there and removed from the source material. He basically took an Aerosmith song (and not a very good one at that) and turned it into a hardcore techno track. I got to give props where props is due, that’s ballsy. But this is just grating on the ears. I thought for a second that maybe I was just getting too old for this shit, but I took a minute to listen to some other hardcore techno from the era and I still dug it. This is just too much. It’s too noisy, too much is going on, and the ballistic Tyler vocals snippets layered over it (especially over the “Fucked” mix) are just too intense.

But I still find myself respecting the tracks. He took a bad rock song and, through sheer force, determination and drum samples, turned it into a…less-than-average-but-not-entirely-horrible techno track. A techno track that, had I heard it in a club in 1997, I probably wouldn’t have thought twice about it and danced right through it. Good on him. Shit, it’s still better than anything on Aerosmith’s Just Push Play, and definitely superior to anything on the last few Moby records.

Sorry to start the new year off with Moby remixes of Aerosmith songs. I had something much better planned but my recordings still sound a bit too scratchy for my tastes. I’m going to run the record through the record cleaner one more time and hope for better results before I share them. I also have just, a near-literal ton of weird Japanese electronic and/or moog albums that I want to share, so you all have that to hopefully look forward too in the coming weeks and months.

 

 

Listen to 1998’s remix of 1999 in 2019

Tuesday, December 3rd, 2019

Some news first. I plan on updating my ridiculously huge guide to Tokyo record stores in the coming month or so, with updated photos and added profiles of various stores that I recently discovered. I plan on making this new guide so big that I’ll probably end up breaking it into two parts; one a “best of” highlight reel, and the other a full-fledged “here’s everything” guide that will be well over 15,000 words. If anyone has any suggestions about what they would like to see in either, let me know.

Now, Prince.

Prince
1999 (The New Master)
Rosario (1999)
1999 (The Inevitable Mix)
1999 (Keep Steppin’)
1999 (Rosie & Doug E. In A Deep House)
1999 (The New Master Edit)
1999 (Acapella)

The 1999 super deluxe box set is out and I highly recommend it, even though I haven’t been able to dive into everything that it has to offer. It is five CDs (and a DVD) after all. I haven’t touched much of the live content or archival remixes/edits all that much, I’ve been far more interested in the vault tracks, many of which are downright fantastic. The estate really did a good job with this one, populating those bonus discs with a good mix of legit, finished tracks that just didn’t make the cut; polished demos and raw takes that sound damn good; and a smattering of live cuts that show Prince playing around with his material on the fly in a fun and interesting way. Great shit all around. If you have any interest in Prince’s 80s output at all, it’s a must buy. I’m sure that the die-hard Prince bootleg collectors out there will find holes in it, and have their own “unreleased” material that they would prefer, but I’m not in that scene so I can remain happily ignorant of what I missed.

The above remixes were not included in the 1999 box set, although they really had no right to be. They were released in 1998 as an effort to capitalize on the literal 1999. These remixes arrived with a thundering thud when they came out, failing to make any substantial impact on the charts in damn near every country.

That makes sense on a few levels. The most obvious being that the world did not need a new version of “1999” in 1998, or in any year for that matter. “1999” is a near perfect song, no “new master,” remix, or any other attempt to rejigger or rework it for a modern audience would be a success, in my opinion. Remember that when “1999” first came out, there were no 12″ or dance remixes of it. The only alternate versions of the original track are radio edits. Prince knew he didn’t need to fuck with it then, he should’ve known not to fuck with it in 1998.

But I think that’s not the only reason why these mixes bombed. I think a lot of it has to do with the song itself. Think about the song “1999” in 1982, there could not be a song that was more in tune with the zeitgeist of the time, not only musically (synths galore) but musically (Ronnie’s gonna nuke the world). In 1999, there couldn’t not be a song more out of touch with the state of reality than the song “1999.” The Cold war was over, compared to the periods immediately before and following, the world was relatively at peace. America was in the middle of a ridiculous bubble economy. The internet was bringing us together in fun and exciting ways, as opposed to the sad and depressing ways it does now. Everybody loved the president. Apolitical was a thing you could be.

This showed in the music of the era. Look at the top songs of 1999, they’re dumb as rocks. The biggest song of that year was “Believe” by Cher. Sugar Ray was one of the biggest rock bands in the world. The closest thing to a song with a message reaching mainstream popularity was “Jumper” by Third Eye Blind.

Compare that to 1983 (when “1999” actually charted). Sure there’s a multitude of stupid shit there, but the number one song of the year was “Every Breath You Take” (which some read as a statement on nuclear proliferation) and there were other dark songs that managed to be big hits as well, like “Maniac,” “Dirty Laundry, and “Twilight Zone.” Yeah, these aren’t political or “serious” songs, but they have an edge to them. There wasn’t no edge or commentary in the popular music of 1999. That shit was polished to a happy sheen.

Of course, the pop hits of 1999 (and 1983) blow most pop hits of 2019 out of the water, since they actually have things like melodies, hooks, and emotions aside from “I’m sad about stuff.” Yowza what a shitty year for pop music this turned out to be. But that’s a whole other topic and I don’t want to write another 1,000 words that’ll just piss 20 year-olds off (I do that enough already).

Okay I got sidetracked. These mixes aren’t…well…they aren’t bad. Okay, a few of them are bad. Like, downright bad. About half of them aren’t even mixes of “1999.” “Rosario” is just Rosario Dawson rambling on for a minute or so, and a couple of other mixes are just excuses for Rosie and Doug E. Fresh to freestyle. But the main remix is actually pretty good, and the edited version is a good abbreviated version of that. The others are good enough, and are worth a listen just of out curiosity if nothing else.

Takkyu Ishino’s techno soccer remix

Sunday, November 10th, 2019

Vangelis
Anthem [Orchestra version with choral introduction]
Anthem [Synthesizer Version]
Anthem (JS Radio Edit)
Anthem [Takkyu Ishino Remix]
Anthem [Takkyu Ishino Remix Radio Edit]

I’m a stupid American so I don’t know anything about “football” and the World Cup (aside from it being horribly corrupt, complacent in countless human rights violations, and vehemently anti-LGTBQ), so could someone tell me, are World Cup themes/songs a “thing?” Meaning, do people care about them at all? Are they played at the games? Is it a big deal when an artist announces they are involved in one?

I’m guessing no?

The above track is from the 2002 World Cup, which was co-hosted by Japan and South Korea. You would think that FIFA would’ve wanted South Korean and Japanese musicians to perform the theme to that games. It could have been a powerful moment, two countries with such a contentious relationship, working together to communicate via the international language of music. Or at the very least you would’ve hoped they called Ryuichi Sakamoto because duh.

Instead they got Vangelis.

I hope it was because someone at FIFA was a big Aphrodite’s Child fan and not because of “Chariots of Fire.”

Usually naming a song “Anthem” is a sign that a musician has their head up their ass (looking at you, Good Charlotte) but since this was literally an anthem to an actual event, it gets a pass. It also sounds anthemic as fuck. It earns the name. Those soaring riffs, that chorus, this is a song custom-made to be rousing like a motherfucker. I close my eyes, listen to this and I can imagine a highlight reel of…I dunno, whatever soccer players do to earn themselves on highlight reels. (Successful flops? Ignored penalties? Abiding the poorly implemented offside rule?) Even without the techno remixes, I would dig this tune. It goes on my workout playlist for sure, right next to “No Easy Way Out” from Rocky IV.

Of course, my interest in this track has absolutely zero to do with any interest in soccer (again, stupid American) or the World Cup (again, horribly corrupt to the point of being cartoonishly evil). I bought it because of Takkyu Ishino’s remix. Ishino is a member of Denki Groove, a Japanese dance/techno act that I love. He also did a great remix of New Order’s fantastic track “Tutti Frutti” a few years back, and in the 90s he contributed a fantastic song to the dope-as-fuck soundtrack to the shitty-as-hell PS1 Ghost In The Shell video game. Ishino is old-school techno, and I mean techno as an actual genre of music not as a blanket word for “electronic music.” If you like your dance music robotic and high-energy, give his stuff a listen. His remix here is fantastic. I liked it so much that, after buying one single that only included a radio edit of the remix, I did a Discogs impulse buy and bought another single that included the full remix, which is even better than the edit. Them techno beats always get me.

And don’t forget that FIFA aided in the murder of thousands of people.

Madonna Minutiae

Sunday, October 27th, 2019

Madonna
Papa Don’t Preach (Edit)
Lucky Star (Single Version)

A few months back I promised to finish the long-delayed third part of my guide to Madonna’s remixes, covering the 2000s. (Here’s Part 1 and Part 2 if you’re interested). But that proved to be much harder than I anticipated thanks to the utterly confusing of digital-only, promo-only and (possibly) streaming-only remixes. I do still plan on getting it done, but I have no idea when that will be.

I also have to update the first two parts of my guide, thanks to (usually very polite) commenters pointing out small mistakes and lesser-known remixes that I missed. But even that’s been a bit of an issue since a lot of them don’t site their sources or provide any evidence for their claims.

For example, many have told me that there’s an exclusive remix to “Open Your Heart” that’s only on the 7″ single to that song. Make sense, a lot of Madonna tracks have 7″ single remixes, and many of those single mixes have yet to find their way to any CD at all. I went ahead and bought the “Open Your Heart” seven inch a few months back, which even has “(Remix)” in the title.

I had to listen to it several times before I was able to pinpoint any differences between that mix and the mix on the Immaculate Collection. From what I can tell, the main difference is that the ending fade out is a little different. The actual mix/master of the song might be different too, but that’s hard to judge when comparing a vinyl rip to a CD version. It’s so similar that I’m not comfortable sharing it here unless someone can’t point out another worthwhile difference I’m missing.

I had the same problem when I picked up a very rare promo 12″ single for “Papa Don’t Preach.” Again, I read that it had an exclusive remix, but I couldn’t figure out exactly how it was different until I listened to it and the album version back-to-back. Turns out that, once again, it’s nearly identical to the album version until the very end, where the fade out is different. However, unlike the “Open Your Heart” remix, it’s a pretty radical difference so I’m sharing it here.

The B-Side to the “Papa Don’t Preach” single is just the album version of the track. However, the B-side to the 7″ single of “Open Your Heart” is “Lucky Star.” Thankfully, it’s also the 7″ version, which has never been released on any Madonna CD. Unlike the “Open Your Heart” remix, it’s easier to hear how this one is different, as it is substantially shorter than any other mix of the track.

It absolutely maddening to me that Madonna has never bothered with a proper re-issue campaign of her classic albums with at least a few of these mixes included. Sure, remixes like the promo edit of “Papa Don’t Preach” are minor and only the die-hard (i.e. gay) fans like me really care about them, but there are plenty of other rare cuts and mixes that regular people would probably care to hear.

There are rumors about that a new 4CD deluxe edition of Like A Prayer is in the works, with a supposed catalog number being leaked a while back. If that does come to pass, it’ll be interesting to see what is included on it. I can imagine that some of those demos that were shared online would be part of it. But what remixes would be included? There are at least 10 remixes of “Like A Prayer” and while I can’t possibly imagine all of them would be there (some of the differences are just too minor to care about) I think that at least half of them are different enough to warrant inclusion. Same goes for “Express Yourself.” An entire CD could be filled of remixes of just those two tracks, but would they even bother with the effort?

Are they looking for someone to help? Yo, Madonna people, I’m available and I work for 12″ promo singles.

Techno Bagpipe Style

Sunday, October 6th, 2019

I know I said that I was going to post some Canadian disco, but in a decision that will disappoint absolutely no one, I changed my mind and will instead share some rare Orbital remixes.

Orbital
Bagpipe Style
New Style
Old Style

I actually found a 12″ single in Japan! This is a rare feat, believe me. Sure, there are plenty of stores that sell 12″ singles of obscure disco and funk here, and there are loads of 12″ singles of ultra-obscure house, trance, and such. But finding a 12″ single by an act that people have actually heard of doesn’t happen all that much here. I don’t know what the deal is with that. Maybe 12″ singles for pop acts never really took off in Japan? I certainly have an easier time finding CD singles, so maybe that format had a stronger foothold back in the day, and that contributed to 12″ singles not being as prominent. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just talking out of my ass. I’m good at that.

I found this single in Tower Records’ new(ish) used vinyl store in Shinjuku. Someone had apparently unloaded all their 90s UK singles, because in the same bin were singles by other UK acts like Primal Scream, Depeche Mode, Pet Shop Boys, The Stone Roses and so on. If you’re wondering why I didn’t purchase those, it was because I either had (and shared) all of them already, or they cost upwards of $20 or more.

Since no one here actually sells 12″ singles worth a damn, whenever they do come in, they tend to go for a bit more, which is a bummer.

For the longest time the focus of my collection was 12″ singles, and the focus of this blog was the remixes that I found on said 12″ singles. So, whenever I do stumble across a 12″ single in Japan that I do want, that has songs I can share online, I get a little nostalgic. Blogging like it’s 2009 up in this bitch!

The original version of “Style,” which is a banger and totally worth having, is on the album Middle Of Nowhere. In America, these remixes were available on the 2CD edition of The Altogether. That version of album appears to be out-of-print on physical and digital formats for some reason, so I got no qualms about sharing them here tonight.

All versions of “Style” are rad as hell (dope stylophone use – hence the track name) but my favorite will always be “Bagpipe Style.” The world needed and continues to need more bagpipes in dance music. The world needs more bagpipes overall. That’s what’s wrong with the world today, a lack of bagpipes in modern music.

I mean, there’s a lot of other things wrong with the world today too, obviously, but a lack of bagpipes in pop music is definitely in the top 100.

More Orbital next time. Maybe. I got a lot of weird shit I need to share. I know, shocking, right?

I survived America, here’s synthpop and Robert Wyatt

Thursday, September 12th, 2019

Yeah, sorry.

I really, really wanted to keep updating the site when I was in the states. I had some posts half-written, had songs picked out, the works.

But, like always, between the jet lag, family time, seeing friends, going shopping, traveling from state-to-state, taking the boyfriend sightseeing, and suffering the occasional nervous breakdown due to the combination of all those things, I just couldn’t squeeze in the time.

But I’m back now bitches! Let’s celebrate with some random remixes from a near-forgotten 80s synthpop band and some weird shit that no one has ever heard of.

Revenge
Slave (Extended Mix)
Slave (Remix Edit)
Slave (Instrumental)
Slave (LP Version Edit)

This is my third post featuring remixes of Revenge tunes, yet I still have not bought their album proper. Because I’m stupid like that.

Revenge was one of Peter Hook’s side-projects. They released a single albumin 1990 but petered (hah PUN INTENDED) out before they could do much else.

In the lexicon of failed New Order side projects, I’m not sure where they rank. As I already said, I don’t have their album so I can’t really judge them fairly. I’m going to go out on a limb though and say that they definitely rank below Electronic and The Other Two (who are both great) and above Bad Lieutenant (which was awful).

This song, and the remixes, are good. I definitely pick up a strong New Order vibe with the bassline, although the song as a whole has a slightly more industrial/aggressive vibe than what New Order was doing at the time.

The 12″ single from which I pulled these also included a “Bonus Beats” track but I’m not including that as it was featured on the easily available re-issue of the group’s sole album, One True Passion. Why they chose to include that minute and a half bit of filler and none of the other, longer, better, more interesting remixes is beyond me.

(The artwork above is from the CD single and I snagged it from Discogs. Sorry, my back hurts far too much for me to dig through my records to properly photograph the 12″.)

 

Robert Wyatt & Bertrand Burgalat
This Summer Night (Hot Chip Mix)
I haven’t talked about it all that much, but I will (hopefully) be starting a podcast soon, in which I, Jeremy Parish of Retronauts fame, and our friend Elliot will be discussing progressive rock. So keep an eye on that.

In the first episode of said podcast, I discussed Soft Machine, which gave me the excuse to dig into original member Robert Wyatt’s discography a bit. I have to say that I dig his stuff (especially his early stuff) far more than anything Soft Machine did after their second album. From that point on, they went full jazz-fusion. And I’m sorry, I just can’t with jazz fusion. I’ve tried my best several times.

Robert Wyatt is an interesting guy, with a deep discography that can be intimidating at times. But if you’re looking to jump in, I recommend the EP’s compilation which, surprise, collects the EPs that he put out early in his solo career. It features fantastic covers of “I’m A Believer,” “Yesterday Man,” and “Biko.” It also includes the Soft Machine classic “Memories,” which was later made somewhat famous by Material’s version that featured a very young Whitney Houston on vocals.

Odd trivia, the members of Material were originally a Gong offshoot by Daevid Allen called New York Gong. When he split, they continued on as Material. Of course, before Allen was in Gong, he was a founding member of…Soft Machine. I assume that’s how the members of Material became aware of “Memories” and decided to cover it.

Anyways, back to this song. The original version of this track was originally including on the Bertrand Burgalat album Cheri B. B., which came out in 2007. I know nothing about him so don’t ask me. I grabbed this remix from a 12″ single of said song.

And if you listen to this song and thing “boy, this Wyatt guy sounds really weird, I wonder his voice was always like that,” the answer is yes. He has sounded like a frail old man on the verge of death since 1968.

 

 

Get Funked Up with Wansel

Sunday, August 11th, 2019

I’m bouncing to the states in less than 24 hours. I’m filled with anxiety and trying to flush at least a bit of that anxiety with a modicum of whiskey. Not too much though. Certainly don’t want to fly with a hangover. Just enough to weaken my liver a bit so when I drink on the plane tomorrow I can pass the fuck out as quickly as possible.

I really hate flying.

As I said previously, I’m going to try my damnedest to get at least a pair of posts out when I’m trapped in America. It won’t be easy though, between the nonstop family visits, jet lag, work I’ll still be doing remotely, record shopping and COPIOUS amounts of coping mechanism alcohol I’ll be consuming, I suspect it will be hard for me to find the time.

So, on the off chance that I can’t get another post out the door for another month, let’s get funky.

Dexter Wansel
Life On Mars (Paul Simpson Funkin’ On Mars Mix)
Theme From The Planets (Paul Simpson Extended Mix)

THIS. IS. THE. FUNKIEST. SHIT.

I know I will be the first and last person to ever say this about the work of Dexter Wansel, but his best stuff really reminds me of the music from the video game De Blob. That speaks less to the quality of the music of De Blob (which is actually amazing) and more to the fact that I don’t know jack about jazz-funk, especially jazz-funk from the states. My jazz-funk knowledge is limited solely to some oddball Japanese releases I’ve picked up over the years, and maybe some Herbie Hancock.

Since I know the musical tastes of the people who frequent this blog most, I’m going to assume that you’re not all that familiar with the work of Dexter Wansel. That’s cool. I’m not all that familiar with the work of Dexter Wansel. I do like saying Dexter Wansel though. Wansel. WANsel. WAAAAAAAAAAAANsel. It’s a fun name to say.

I swear I’m not high, just a little drunk.

I first discovered Wansel (waaaaaaaaaaaa- sorry I’ll stop) relatively recently, in the same way that I discover the majority of older acts that I listen to these days; I picked up his record semi-randomly at a record store, gave it a quick spin, and liked what I heard.

The record in question was 1978’s Voyager, his third album overall. That album is holy shit great. Dope bass. DOPE. The bass on the title track will steal your car, crash it into your work, and punch your boss in the face. That’s how dope it is.

DOPE.

You’re fucking lucky. That album is on iTunes for a steal, and I assume it’s on streaming services too. You need to listen to that motherfucker right now. It’s dope.

These songs are not on Voyager. They were originally on his debut album, Life On Mars. These mixes were done for a special limited-edition Record Store Day release. Since I have yet to see these tracks pop up on any digital service, I felt they were fair game to share.

These tracks are also dope. They’re not “Voyager” levels of dope. (YO THAT SONG IS DOPE). But they’re still rad as hell. Wansel plays synthesizer on these, and I guess that’s what’s supposed to be the focus here. But for me, and just like on “Voyager” what really sticks out to me is the bass. It just fucking murders me it’s so good.

The bass player on these tracks is Derrick Graves. Like Wansel, he did a lot of work for Philadelphia International Records, cropping up on albums by artists like Billy Paul and Leon Huff. Unlike Wansel though, he never got his chance to shine as a solo performer. Shame.

Enjoy the dope funk. Let it give you strength. Use it to smite your enemies and cast out your foes.

Oh for god’s sake don’t come to America

Tuesday, August 6th, 2019

The System
Coming To America (Independence Mix)
Coming To America (American Dub Mix)
Coming To America (Part Two)

Apparently they are making a sequel to Coming To America? I’ll believe that when I see it, the proverbial “they” were also allegedly making another sequel to Beverly Hills Cop. I hope they do make a sequel. I hope they make it real as fuck. Have the son of Eddie Murphy’s character travel to America to try and find his bride and have him immediately shot by the NYPD for the crime of breathing while black. Or have him go a nightclub to look for a girl and have him get gunned down in a mass shooting. Fuck it.

Sorry, shit’s been too real.

Anyways, I have seen Coming To America probably at least a dozen or so times, and I have no recollection of this song. My memories of that film basically boil down to the scene with the bald woman, the McDonald’s jokes, Samuel L. Jackson, the Trading Places reference, and “the royal penis is clean your highness.”

Oh yeah, and Soul Glow, but that’s mostly because of Lizzo referencing it in her amazing video for her dope song “Juice.”

Every time I try to think of this song when I’m not listening to it, I end up getting “Living In America” stuck in my head instead. And let’s be real, that song is a million times better than this track, which is a textbook example of completely competent but still utterly forgettable late-80s mainstream synthpop funk.

The song is by The System, a group that I know nothing about. Some basic Wikipedia and YouTube browsing shows me that they had at least a few minor hits (and even one top ten single) but I’ll be damned if I’ve heard any of them. It’s amazing how many mid-level acts from the late-80s have vanished off the face of the Earth. I feel that you can put The System’s top ten single, “Don’t Disturb This Groove” right up there with “Shake You Down” by Gregory Abbot and “Casanova” by LeVert on a greatest hits that time forgot. Synthfunk in the late-80s really took a dive and it did not age well at all.

I don’t want to shit on The System too much though. I’m sure they were a fine band for their time, and they did chart on more than once occasion, so good on them. Also, from what I’ve heard of their first couple albums, they had a really rad electro-funk sound for a while that actually has aged well. So if you find this track of any interest at all, I suggest checking out their first LP, it has some hidden gems on it.

Anyways, speaking of Coming to America, I’m coming to America! For the majority of August and into September, I’ll be visiting my once fine home country to pay visit to friends and family and eat as much Little Caesar’s pizza as humanly possible. Previous trips to the states have seen this blog fall into an involuntary hiatus of sorts, and I’m going to my best to prevent that this time. I already have a couple blog posts done and in the can, so I hope I can get a few more done before I leave next week, allowing me to keep the blog updated while I’m out and about in the greater Toledo to Pittsburgh area, drinking root beer and hoping not to fall victim to another mass shooting.

I even have at least one more synthpop 12″ single in the wings, so hey, those of you lamenting for the good old days of this blog should be stoked.

The most anyone has written about “I Can’t Dance” in nearly 20 years.

Friday, July 5th, 2019

Genesis
I Can’t Dance (The Other Mix)
I Can’t Dance (The Sex Mix)
In Too Deep (Live)
That’s All (Live)
On The Shoreline
Hearts On Fire

Is there a thinkpiece out there about how all the prog acts went mainstream all at the same time? Let’s make a timeline:

  • 1977 – Genesis, with Steve Hackett out of the picture, release And Then There Were Three, they immediately get the biggest mainstream hit of their career to that date with “Follow You, Follow Me.”
  • 1982 – Prog giants John Wetton, Geoff Downes, Steve Howe, and Carl Palmer combine their progressive rock talents and form…Asia, who score a massive adult-contemporary hit with “Heat Of The Moment.”
  • 1983 – Yes go full synthpop with 90215 and hit it huge with “Owner Of A Lonely Heart.”
  • 1985 – Howe and Hackett join forces to form GTR, the poor man’s Asia. Meanwhile, Peter Gabriel releases mainstream art-pop masterpiece So, which garners him pop uber-hit “Sledgehammer.”
  • 1986 – The Moody Blues release The Other Side Of Life, trading in the flutes and orchestras for a keyboard and scoring the hit single “Your Wildest Dreams” as a result.
  • 1987 – Pink Floyd, free from Roger Waters’ mommy and daddy issues, release A Momentary Lapse of Reason, which gives the world the “Learning To Fly.”

Selling out (a term I am not using derisively here) is hard work, and I think that the different levels of success you find here certainly prove that. Yes and Asia were able to find success by updating their sound for the 80s, but neither could get much further than that, and failed to capitalize off that success with their coming albums. Ditto for The Moody Blues, anyone remember anything they recorded after “Your Wildest Dreams?” And can anyone out there remember anything from GTR?

Pink Floyd managed a little better just by resting on their back catalog. You know what’s a great song? Pink Floyd’s “On The Turning Away.” You know what’s also a great song? “Learning To Fly.” You know what’s a fucking terrible song? Damn near everything else on that album. Pink Floyd would sit out the remainder of the 80s-sound era of rock and not record another album until The Division Bell (which also isn’t great but much more in the vein of classic Floyd). Post-Waters Floyd was a touring machine first, an album-maker second.

Of all these acts, the only one who managed to keep their pop momentum going was Genesis. Hell, not only were they able to score pop hit after pop hit from 1977 to 1991 with nearly all the albums they put out, they also were able to continue that pop streak with incredibly successful solo albums by Phil Collins and Mike Rutherford (Mike + The Mechanics are underrated dammit).

But all good things must come to an end. Even if Phil Collins hadn’t jumped ship after We Can’t Dance, I can’t imagine that the band would’ve been able to keep things going in a post-Nirvana world. At least, not in any respectable way. Let’s be real, if Phil Collins would’ve stuck around with Genesis, then we would’ve ended up with Genesis doing some version of that fucking Tarzan song. Comparatively speaking Calling All Stations is a less embarrassing move.

I’ll be honest, while I own a lot of Genesis, I do not own We Can’t Dance. I’m sure that it still has some remnant of their progressive roots on that album somewhere, that somewhere sure as hell isn’t “I Can’t Dance.”

“I Can’t Dance” is without a doubt Genesis as their most pop. While Genesis had their share of love songs, remember that many previous Genesis pop hits covered topics as heavy as drug addiction (“Tonight, Tonight, Tonight”) nuclear war (“Land of Confusion”) and…whatever the fuck “Mama” is about. Meanwhile, “I Can’t Dance” is a biting satire on…jeans commercials.

Man, the early-90s were a simpler time.

The early-90s were also a bit of a nadir for pop music. This was the era of easy listening, quiet storm, and smooth ballads. Other pop hits from around this time include the Celine Deon “Beauty And The Beast” song (which won a fucking Grammy), “You’re In Love” by Wilson Phillips, and Bette Midler’s “From A Distance.” Compared to those songs, “I Can’t Dance” is punk. Sure, it’s a stupid satire about jeans commercials, but at least its commenting on something. At least it’s not Amy Grant (who also was a mainstream pop star at this time).

Did “I Can’t Dance” need two “dance” remixes? No. Did it need one dance remix? Probably not. Did it need a remix called “Sex Mix?” Absolutely definitely not in a million years. But the remixes aren’t bad. “The Other Mix” was done by remix legend Ben Liebrand, and it has that big 80s sound that he was so good at. But the “Sex Mix” (sigh) is even better and sounds a little ahead of its time. It’s almost a proto-big beat tune, which makes total sense considering the remixers were Apollo 440 (before going by that name). Wonder if they ever drop this one in a DJ set?

I took these remixes from two CD singles, one for “I Can’t Dance” and the other for “Jesus He Knows Me.” Sadly, neither had any remixes for “Jesus He Knows Me,” which is a much better song than I can’t dance (with a far more relevant social message) but they did have some interesting tracks. The live songs are fine, they are what they are, live versions of decent Genesis tunes, performed aptly. But the real highlights here are the B-sides. “On The Shoreline” is coulda-been-a-single good. The simple-but-effective riff drives the song with good momentum, and Collins’ vocals are exceptionally strong. It’s a good, propulsive rock song. Meanwhile, “Hearts On Fire” (which is sadly not a cover of the song from Rocky IV) is a dope as fuck love song with a killer bassline and a downright awesome “check out what our samplers can do” breakdown. Fucking loving this track. Maybe I do need to buy We Can’t Dance? I’m nearly 40 years old now, I assume I’m that album’s intended demographic at this point.

If you found this post interesting and want to hear me ramble on even more about prog, then I’ll have good news for you in the coming weeks! If you didn’t find this post interesting and you don’t want to hear me ramble on even more about prog…um…I’m sure I’ll post some obscure game music soon!