Let’s All Go Back To LiveJournal and Listen to Madonna Together

Okay so I need to rant about something and I really can’t do it on my other site because less understanding family go there and I can’t do it on Twitter because it would be about a thousand tweets. So congrats, you all win.

Like, what the fuck is wrong with Facebook?

What is it about Facebook that brings out the absolutely shittiest forms of expression in people? Facebook should be awesome, especially for someone like me, an expat who has friends on multiple continents. But it’s not. It’s a wasteland of horrifically unfunny plagiarized memes, anti-science babbling and racist bullshit.

Why? Why do people feel the need to contribute to that festering stew? Who clicks “like” on something that says “click like if you remember [NOSTALGIA]?” Why do that?

Ugh. It’s disgusting. And seeing a sizable minority of my friends recently speak out against #blacklivesmatter as something that’s allegedly racist just makes my head want detach itself from my neck and crawl itself up my ass just because it might find less shit there.

If your natural response to seeing someone post something related to #blacklivesmatter is to say “hey all lives matter” then shut up. Just shut up. Google “All lives matter” and see the racist mountain you’re willing to die on. Shut up. It’s not about you. Shut up and listen. I’m willing to bet you don’t do that a lot.

I’ve given up all hope that we’ll ever live in a “post-racial” society but I’m counting down the days and praying that we someday live in a “post Facebook” one.

There should be a social network dedicated to only sharing original content. Of course, if there was no one would bother to use it, because writing original content is hard and scary and omg look at this Minions meme.

Here are some Latin interpretations of Japanese techno songs performed by a German DJ. And Madonna because I’m gay.

Señor Coconut and His Orchestra
Limbo (instrumental version)
Behind The Mask (Original Hamster’s Yellow Miami Magic Sound Orchestra Machine Remix)

The Madmen (instrumental version)
Ongaku (instrumental version)
Simoon (instrumental version)
I could have sworn that I posted some Señor Coconut before. Huh. Strange. Maybe it was attached to one of the very few posts I’ve had flagged for DMCA violations before (upside to maintaining a woefully unpopular blog on my own server is that I don’t get a lot of those).

Anways, Señor Coconut is the alter ego of one Uwe Schmidt, a German DJ based in Chile. As Mr. Coconut, Schmidt takes classic songs and reimagines them as bossa nova dance jams. It’s a solid concept.

In 2005 he dedicated an entire album to bossa nova covers of Yellow Magic Orchestra songs and called it Yellow Fever. I found a vinyl copy of it last year and fell in love with it. But I was extra elated to pick up a used copy of the Japanese CD edition last week, as it contains a shitload of bonus tracks, all of which I’m including here.

Strangely, on the CD itself the remix of “Behind The Mask” is included as a “secret track” attached to the instrumental of “Ongaku.” As to make things a little less confusing, I went ahead and separated them into two separate tunes.

Madonna
Give It 2 Me (Eddie Amador Club)
Give It 2 Me (Fedde Le Grand Remix)
Give It 2 Me (Eddie Amador House Lovers Remix)
Give It 2 Me (Oakenfold Extended Remix)
Give It 2 Me (Tong & Spoon Wonderland Mix)
Give It 2 Me (Jody den Broeder Club)
Give It 2 Me (Sly and Robbie Ragga Mix)
Another product of the great Madonna singles buying marathon of April. While “Give It 2 Me” is not a bad song, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that it didn’t deserve this multitude of remixes.

5 Responses to “Let’s All Go Back To LiveJournal and Listen to Madonna Together”

  1. Jon J says:

    [long time reader, first time commenter]

    That was a great rant–some real gems in there, among them “Google ‘All lives matter’ and see the racist mountain you’re willing to die on.” Also the bit about your head detaching from your neck and finding less shit in your ass. You have a way with words. I’ve been pulling away from Facebook for the same reason and it’s nice to read someone so vividly describe what I’m feeling also. On another note, happy future record hunting! It’s always interesting to see what you feature.

  2. flying spaghetti monster says:

    I am a big fan of Señor Coconut’s album of Kraftwerk covers. Good times.

  3. Chris says:

    I vacillated for a while then I saw The Social Network (great film, great soundtrack) and finally got rid of my Facebook account. I don’t miss it. OK, maybe a bit, but I don’t get angry so much now.

  4. ~R says:

    Just thinking about Facebook obliterates all rational thought and replaces it with nothing but variations on expletives. Since I’ve enough trouble not using expletives in normal discourse I usually try and refrain from thinking about Facebook. Yay, I’m a winner. Some contests aren’t worth it, lol. Anyway, fact of the matter is that most people are boring and boring because schlepping a living is draining and leaves little time for critical thought. And, you’re familiar with the filter bubble concept? Yeah, that’s Facebook. Maybe, maybe not. Fuck. I’ve got a head full of expletives now, thanks man.

  5. Bunny says:

    I don’t mean to be disingenuous because I hate it when people diss things without trying them but I’m not on FaceBook. Someone asked me the other day if I’d had a bad break up and committed FaceBook suicide. And I was, like, “Errr. No. None of those things. I’ve just never been on FaceBook.” And what you said made me laugh and reassures me because I trust your opinion – and you made me laugh! Of course I don’t KNOW for sure, but I FEEL like my life isn’t suffering in any way by e-mailing, phoning, Skyping and even sending the occasional post card to my friends and veering away from social networking in general and only ever leaving POSITIVE comments on blogs and posts. So *thumbs up* from the UK. Love your quirkier posts like the game music and the “wrasslin”! All jolly good! Xs Buns

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