Keyboards Affair
Tubular Bells (New Dance Version)
Commando
I saw this in a progressive rock record store, of all places, for about five bucks. Upon laying my eyes on it I immediately knew I wanted it. A “dance version” of “Tubular Bells?” Who would be so stupid/insane/brilliant to try such a thing, and why did I know that they were Italian?

This is the sole release by Keyboards Affair, aka Roberto Rossi, best known as the producer/writer of Sabrina’s international trash dance hit “Boys.” You ever seen the original video for that shit? Jesus Christ. I’m gayer than a rainbow at a Cher concert but even I’m taken aback by that one, or should I say, those two. Did that actually air on TV?!

Sorry, something got the breast best of me for a second. This is a decent, fun mix of “Tubular Bells,” although the spoken word interlude is entirely worthless and should not be there. “Commando” is sadly not a remix of any of the music from the Arnold film, but an original piece (at least I think so). It’s a good jam, with a slight creepy, dark vibe to it. Have Justice sampled this? I feel like Justice should sample this. The end of this, vocal snippets not withstanding, is really quite good.

Utah Saints
Believe In Me (7″ Edit)
Believe In Me (DJ Tim’s Bliss Mix)
What Can You Do For Me? (Madness Mix)
“Believe In Me” features a sample of Sylvester’s “Do You Wanna Funk.” That, by definition, means it is one of the greatest dance songs of all time. These two remixes still have that sample, so they are very good.

The original version of “What Can You Do For Me?” is built entirely off of a sample from The Eurythmics’ classic “There Must Be An Angel Playing With My Heart.” That, by definition, also means it is one of the greatest dance songs of all time. Who doesn’t want to dance to Annie Lennox? This remix keeps that Eurythmics sample, but at a reduced rate. That’s not right. I feel that when you’re listening to “What Can You Do For Me?” you come in expecting a certain percentage of that song to be comprised of samples of Annie Lennox’s godlike voice. When you remove any percentage of said sample, you’re make the song that much worse. It’s just simple math. If anything, when remixing “What Can You Do For Me?” you should add MORE Annie Lennox. Well, I guess that’s true for most things. Nothing has ever been damaged by adding Annie Lennox to it.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 3rd, 2021 at 10:58 pm and is filed under remixes, Utah Saints. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.