Justly Forgotten 80s Relics

June 25th, 2014

I haven’t forgotten about my promise to update this blog five days a week come July. In fact, I’ve been rapidly recording material to fill the space. I still got plenty of time, right?

Oh fuck.

Terri Nunn And Paul Carrack
Romance (Love Theme From Sing)
Sing is a 1989 musical drama from the writer of Footloose and the director of…nothing else. It stars about two star-crossed teens in a downtrodden Brooklyn neighborhood who discover their love for music, and each other, while preparing for their school talent show. (Can you tell I used to write shitty movie descriptions for a living?)

The film also stars Lorraine Bracco from The Sopranos as a tough street smart teacher. It’s also apparently a giant piece of shit. I’ve never seen it, and judging from the fact that it has yet to be released on DVD or Blu-ray, I probably never will.

Both the film and the soundtrack have a minor following however, judging from the overly in-depth description of the plot on Wikipedia, and the fact that CD copies of the soundtrack go for higher-than-average used prices.

Like I said, I’ve never seen the movie, so I can’t attest to its quality. I have, however, listened to the soundtrack and goddamn it’s awful. Michael Bolton! Mickey Thomas! Bill Champlin! It’s a who’s who of who gives a fuck.

The only thing close to a decent tune on the LP is the theme track, a duet by Berlin’s Terri Nunn and professional band nomad Paul Carrack (Roxy Music, Mike + The Mechanics, Ace, about a billion other things). To be honest it’s actually not all that great a tune, typical 80s easy listening schlock, but I just love me some Terri Nunn so I’m a bit biased.

Oh, and while the Wiki description is needlessly complex, I love the horribleness of the IMDB summary: “A teen film about an Italian punk forced to work with an innocent Jewish girl.”

Harold Faltermeyer
The Race Is On
The Race Is On (Radio Edit)
The Race Is On (Instrumental)
The Race Is On (Dub Version)
“The Race Is On”  is a radical re-working/remix/remake of the theme to Starlight Express, the 1974 musical by Andrew Lloyd Weber about toy trains.

For real.

The cast (playing the trains) perform entirely on roller skates.

Yes, this is a song by Harold Faltermeyer, based off the work of Andrew Lloyd Weber, about a bunch of dudes in rollerskates pretending to be trains. So the next time someone tells you the 80s were full of nothing but awesome shit, throw this in their face.

Seriously though, this tune is pretty rad – great electro vibe.

Posted in Harold Faltermeyer, Terri Nunn | 1 Comment »

Cowley Disco Funtimes

June 9th, 2014

I’ts been an on my feet for 10 hours while getting backhanded compliments kind of day. Time for disco.

Sylvester
I (Who Have Nothing) (Short Version)
Take Me To Heaven (12″ Mix)
Lovin’ Is Really My Game (12″ Remix)
Living For The City (12″ Remix)
Sylvester is dope. Sylvester is dope. Sylvester is motherfucking dope. I don’t know how many times I can say that. Y’all know Sylvester right? You should. Cuz he’s dope.

I’ve posted Sylvester tracks more times than I can count at this point (okay, it’s been like five times or something) but I somehow never got around to posting these banging remixes, which I snagged from various Megatone Records boxsets and a random 12″ single.

Of these, the 10+ minute mix of “Take Me To Heaven” is the clear standout, but the 12″ mix of “Lovin’ Is Really My Game” is also killer. Shit, they’re all great. You need them in your life.

And in case you were wondering, the “long” version of “I (Who Have Nothing)” is the album version. It’s 10 minutes long. The “short” version is a far more conservative six minutes.

Paul Parker
Shot In The Night
Paul Parker was another one of Patrick Cowley’s cohorts, and while I expected to find out that he had passed away like most in the early-80s disco scene, I’m happy to report that he’s still keeping this fab torch going, releasing Hi-NRG music on his own label and everything! Way to go dude.

“Shot In The Night” is not “Lovin’ Is Really My Game” but it’s still a satisfactory tune that should generate a moderate amount of booty-shaking.

By the way the mega Depeche Mode post is coming soon.

Posted in Patrick Cowley, Paul Parker, remixes, Sylvester | 5 Comments »

Bananarama and an EMF song that isn’t Unbelievable

June 1st, 2014

It seems like I haven’t posted a random selection of 80s remixes in forever. Feels good.

Bananarama
Venus (The Hellfire Mix)
Venus (Fire & Brimstone Mix)
Venus (Extended Version)
Venus (Dub Version)
I have no recollection of buying this, taking this home, cleaning this record, playing it on my turntable, recording it to my hard drive, editing the recording into MP3s or putting them in my iTunes library. I guess these remixes really made an impression on me.

Let’s be real here, combined these four tracks are over 30 minutes long – and I don’t think the world needed a half an hour of “Venus” remixes. And that’s coming from me, the guy who just spent 300 yen (thee bucks) on a Phil Collins remix EP just for the 8 minute version of “Take Me Home,” so I think it’s safe to say that I have a pretty high tolerance of superfluous remixes.

That being said, the “Fire & Brimstone” remix ain’t half bad, and the simple extended mix is pretty good too. The same can’t be said for the nine-minute “Hellfire” mix that just devolves into a series of handclaps (seriously) at one point. It sounds like someone fell asleep on the sampler.

EMF
They’re Here (Cenobyte Mix)
They’re Here (Mosh Mix)
Phantasmagoric (Remix)
I’m gonna be real here. I bought this 12″ single solely because of the name of the first remix, hoping that it would incorporate some Hellraiser samples. I was not let down! It also samples The KLF – so it’s doubly dope. Acid house for life.

Posted in Bananarama, EMF, remixes | 4 Comments »

Prom Night: Death By Disco (And An Axe To The Head)

May 23rd, 2014

Yay the Amplitude Kickstarter hit its goal!

Oh shit I have to update this blog five days a week for a month. I didn’t think this through that well.

Actually, I did think this through. While there were some reasons for my lack of updating earlier this year (too busy, health issues, computer problems) now I have no excuse, and I just haven’t been writing as much because I’ve been lazy. So I’m glad that my gambit paid off, it’ll force me to sit down and actually write some shit again.

But notice that I said “a month” not “next month.” Between my backlog of stuff that I haven’t recorded yet and a sudden family visit due in the beginning of June, the five-day-a-week plan probably isn’t going to come to full fruition until July. It’s for the best tho, with a month to plan, those posts are going to be pretty damn great.

In the long-term, I hope this schedule gets me back in the habit of updating this site twice a week, and Mostly-Retro at least once every other week (I’m planning on some longform things that take time for that one).

But for now, here’s a disco-filled soundtrack to a horrifically bad horror film.

promnight

Prom Night – Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (Complete Album Download Link)

The hierarchy of Jamie Lee Curtis horror films (1978-1981):

  1. Halloween
  2. Roadgames
  3. The Fog
  4. Halloween II
  5. Terror Train
  6. Prom Night

No, I’m not overselling Terror Train. It’s a piece of shit. But that only goes to show you just how much of a piece of shit Prom Night is. In an era that was pumping out more forgettable slasher flicks than you can possibly imagine (And they were forgettable, anyone remember Tourist Trap, The Prowler or Slaughterhouse, just for starters? Didn’t think so.) Prom Night is one of the worst, with absolutely nothing to set it apart from the deluge of masked killer movies of the week aside from its somewhat interesting cast, which also includes Leslie Nielsen in one of his last “serious” roles. The killer in Prom Night is forgettable, the murder scenes are forgettable, the plot is forgettable. It’s the Deep Blue Something’s “Breakfast At Tiffanys” of slasher films.

About the only thing that makes the movie stand out at all, aside from its cast, is its wonderfully cheesy discotastic soundtrack, which actually comes to play in the only memorable scene in the film, an axe fight on the prom’s disco dance floor.

No doubt the movie’s disco-heavy soundtrack was created with commercial aspirations, but for some reason the soundtrack itself was never released in the states or in Canada (where the film was produced). Nope, the only country that was blessed enough to get a proper LP release of it was Japan – because if there’s one thing Japan loves, it’s horrible disco scores to shitty 80s slasher films.

Okay, that’s not true at all, I’m just trying to find some sort of rationale behind this.

The soundtrack was primarily the work of two people: Paul Zaza and Carl Zittrer. The two often worked together in the 80s, and either separately or combined created the scores to films such as Porky’s, Turk 182, A Christmas Story and even the theme song to Mr. Wizard’s World. On his own, Zaza also contributed to the scores of Prom Night II and III, making him probably the only continuous thread between those two films and the first (they have nothing in common from a narrative standpoint). Zittrer also worked as a music supervisor and editor, working as such in big name pictures like New Jack City and Moonstruck.

Oh, and Zaza also has a credit on a Kid Cudi album, but I’m going to guess that’s because of a sample.

Like I said, those two make up most of the soundtrack, but there are three tracks on the LP that are credited to a group called Blue Bazar, who I can find next to nothing about online. From what I can tell, Prom Night was the beginning and end of their musical output. So if anyone out there can shed some light on who they are or what they did afterward, I’d be very interested.

Anyways, as cheesy and silly as this music is, I do have to admit that I admire and respect it’s tenacity and upbeat feeling. This is made for the dance floor disco at its purest, silly and stupid. Don’t try to think about it too much and you might enjoy it a little.

 

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments »

Vintage 8-Bit Jams and a Kickstarter Plea

May 12th, 2014

One of my favorite games of all-time is Harmonix’s Amplitude, an amazing rhythm game that served as the foundation for the Guitar Hero and Rock Band series. It’s fucking dope, and I wish more people remembered it.

Thankfully, right now Harmonix is using Kickstarter to bring back the series! Which is great! However, with less than two weeks to go before their deadline, they’re still well short of their goal, which is not great!

I love this game and I want to see a new one (I gave…far too much to this Kickstarter) and I want to do whatever I can to help make that happen.  So while my blog isn’t exactly popular, I’m going to do what I can, which is bribe what few readers I do have in the hopes that every little bit helps.

If the Amplitude Kickstarter is a success, I will update Lost Turntable five days a week for one month. And each post will have completely new music, no reposts, no re-recordings. All new shit. So if you’re a reader of this site and have lamented my lack of updates since my move to Tokyo, yo, this is your way to get my ass writing again.

So what are you waiting for? Head over to the Amplitude Kickstarter page and send them a few bucks!

Then when you’re done with that check out this vintage collection of dope game music!

konami

Konami Game Music Vol. 1 (complete album download link)

When I was on Retronauts last year (which, if you haven’t heard, you can listen to here) I briefly mentioned the instrumental role that Yellow Magic Orchestra had in getting game music released in Japan. Not only did the group sample video game sounds in their early releases, they started their own label to release game music, the ingeniously-titled G.M.O. Records (Game Music Orchestra).

The first release on said label was simply titled Video Game Music, and I’m fairly certain it was the first full-length video game soundtrack ever released (early 1985), although I could be mistaken. They followed it up later that year with The Return of Video Game Music.

After that, they got a bit more specific with their releases, focusing more on individual game companies for each album. The first of these was Famicom Music, which featured nothing but music from Nintendo-produced Famicom titles. With a roster of tunes that includes themes from The Legend Of Zelda, Super Mario Bros., Excitebike and motherfucking Balloon Fight (in a remixed version no less!) it’s definitely on my want list. One day it will be mine.

But while I don’t have that stellar compilation, I do have the second developer-focused release by GMO, Konami Game Music Vol. 1, which came out in 1986. While it doesn’t have anything as well-regarded and classic as the Zelda or Mario themes on it, it does have some pretty great standout tunes. The theme music to Yie Ar Kung Fu is included in full, and that shit is dope (even with the game sound effects playing over it). But by far the real standouts here are the TWO versions of the Gradius theme music; the original version and a remixed (or “arranged”) version. The original Gradius theme is some of the greatest game music of all-time, so getting any version of it is a win in my book.

And if this leaves you in the mood for more game music, I recommend the amazing soundtrack to Darius, which you can actually get on iTunes (wow). Check out this batshit insane live version of the Darius theme “Chaos.”

Woah.

Posted in Complete Albums, Game Music, soundtrack | 1 Comment »

The Second Biggest Madonna Post Ever

May 4th, 2014

I got my computer ready to go (the solution to my grounding problem was to ignore it and just plug it in anyways, apparently) and my turntable hooked up! Everything is connected and my recordings actually sound cleaner than ever before because…I have no idea why but I’m going to run with it and be happy.

So yeah, I’m just going to dump the rest of the promised Madonna remixes so I can get them out of the way and move onto posting some hot new shit. Don’t worry, I’ll still post the Depeche Mode stuff somewhat soonish…ish.

Right now I’m listening to the soundtrack to Darius. On vinyl. I’m in a weird place.

Madonna
Human Nature (Runway Club Mix)
Human Nature (I’m Not Your Bitch Mix)
Human Nature (Runway Club Mix Radio Edit)
Human Nature (Bottom Heavy Dub)
Human Nature (Howie Tee Remix)
Into The Groove (Shep Pettibone Remix)
Keep It Together (12″ Remix)
Keep It Together (Dub)
Keep It Together (12″ Extended Mix)
Keep It Together (12″ Mix)
Keep It Together (Bonus Beats)
Keep It Together (Instrumental)
Keep It Together (Shep Pettibone Remix)
Open Your Heart (Extended Version)
Open Your Heart (Dub)
Papa Don’t Preach (Extended Remix)
Rescue Me (Lifeboat Vocal)
Rescue Me (Titanic Vocal)
Rescue Me (Houseboat Vocal)
Rescue Me (S.O.S. Mix)
Sky Fits Heaven (Shasha Remix Edit)
True Blue (Instrumental)
True Blue (Remix Edit)
What It Feels Like For A Girl (Above And Beyond 12″ Club Mix)
What It Feels Like For A Girl (Paul Oakenfold Perfecto Mix)
Told you it was a lot. Have fun.

 

Posted in Madonna, remixes | 7 Comments »

Madonnarama

April 21st, 2014

A solution to my idiotic power problem may be en route, I’m talking to my landlord about it later this week. I’m sure I can get this shit together soon. I sure hope so, having my computer sitting next to me while I write this on my dinky little laptop sure is frustrating.

So…how yinz doing? I noticed that this past Saturday was Record Store Day. Everyone get everything they wanted? Or were thy screwed over my a manipulated market of manufactured scarcity built to capitalize off of a speculator-driven bubble that’s due to burst any day now and take down the vinyl boom with it?

Oh, sorry was that too harsh? I’m having some pretty mixed feelings on Record Store Day as of late, hopefully I’ll be able to put something a bit more organized and concrete about my feelings later this week. Arguing with boutique record labels really frustrated me.

In the meantime, here are some remixes to two of the greatest pop songs ever recorded. I’m going out of alphabetical order tonight because I fucked up it’s my blog and I do what I want to.

Madonna
Express Yourself (Non-Stop Express Mix)
Express Yourself (Stop & Go Dubs)
Express Yourself (Local Mix)
Like A Prayer (7 Inch Remix)
Like A Prayer (12 Inch Club Version)
Like A Prayer (12 Inch Dance Mix)
Like A Prayer (12 Inch Extended Remix)
Like A Prayer (Bass Dub)
Like A Prayer (Churchapella)
Like A Prayer (Instra Dub)
Like A Prayer (Dub Beats)
The “Express Yoursellf” remixes were all taken from the 12″ single, while the “Like A Prayer” ones were culled from two different 12″ singles, one commercially released and one a club promo. Despite their similar names, all the 12″ remixes are different. They are also all worth hearing.

Posted in Madonna, remixes | 2 Comments »

More Madonna and someone help me

April 16th, 2014

Okay everyone, a billion thanks, cookies, MP3s and hugs to anyone who can figure out this bullshit for me.

My computer from the US has arrived in Japan! Yay! However, its power supply is of the three-prong variety, meaning  I need a three prong power cord in order to plug it in. That’s not a problem, I can get those in Japan. However, since I am in Japan, all my outlets are of the two prong variety. I bought a few three-to-two prong converters, but there’s a problem with those. Those kind of converters have a little clamp attached to them. You’re supposed to screw them to your outlet to ground it correctly. See here for an example.

Yeah, that’s great except outlets in Japan don’t have those screws. And I can’t take the outlet off the wall because it’s attached to the drywall.

So what the fuck are my options? I’m really frustrated and pissed off about this, and equally frustrated that no one can explain to me WHY this is such a complicated problem. It’s 2014 y’all! We can build a solar-powered plane that can fly forever but we can’t build some sort of converter that can fucking ground a goddamn outlet? Why the fuck not? Why is this so complicated?! I’m half-tempted just to strip out my PC’s power supply and replace it with a two-prong one…if I knew how to do that at all.

So yeah, want new music on Lost Turntable? Solve this problem. How do I safely ground my computer with absolutely no possible way to ground it the way that every single poorly-written, idiotic, “you must be in America, right? So we’ll right this about American electronics only” guide fails to fucking mention.

Argh.

Here’s a mediocre Madonna song.

Madonna
Deeper And Deeper (Shep’s Classic 12 Inch Mix)
Deeper And Deeper (Shep’s Deep Makeover Mix)
Deeper And Deeper (Shep’s Deep Beats)
Deeper And Deeper (David’s Klub Mix)
Deeper And Deeper (David’s Deeper Dub)
Deeper And Deeper (Shep’s Deeper Dub)
Drowned World/Substitute For Love (BT and Sasha’s Bucklodge Ashram Remix)
I’m not really a fan of “Deeper And Deeper” but I am a fan of being a completist, hence me owning the 12″ single an the six remixes that came with it.

Posted in Madonna, remixes | 10 Comments »

Madonnathon Day 1

April 15th, 2014

Madonnathon has begun. Over the next few days I’m going to post all the Madonna tracks that I had a chance to re-record before I took off for Japan, as well as a few surprises along the way, all in alphabetical order to make things easier.

I will not be reposting ALL The Madonna I’ve ever posted. I didn’t get a chance to get through all of the tracks before I left, so those hoping for remixes to “American Life” are out of luck. Also, if you want remixes of “American Life” what the fuck is wrong with you?

Madonna
Ain’t No Big Deal
Angel (Extended Dance Mix)
Beautiful Stranger (Calderoe Radio Mix)
Beautiful Stranger (Calderone Club Mix)
Bedtime Story (Junior’s Sound Factory Mix)
Bedtime Story (Junior’s Sound Factory Dub)
Bedtime Story (Orbital Mix)
Bedtime Story (Junior’s Wet Dream Mix)
Bedtime Story (Junior’s Wet Dream Dub)
Borderline (New Mix)
Causing A Commotion (Silver Screen Mix)
Causing A Commotion (Dub)
Causing A Commotion (Movie House Mix)
Crazy For You (Remix)
A through C certainly starts things off with a high note, featuring a bevy of excellent “Bedtime Stories” remixes as well as simple-but-great extended mixes of classic Madonna tunes “Crazy For You” and “Angel” (my secret favorite early Madonna cut). The mix of “Borderline” might be the best of that bunch, however it is a little scratchy at the beginning. Sorry, I just couldn’t scrub that one clean.

The “Causing A Commotion” remixes are great too, but when I first recorded these back in the day I had to do a lot of editing on the file to fix some hellacious scratches, and in the process I probably heard the song about 1,000,000 times (give or take). As such, I think I’m forever sick of that tune. Can’t get sick of “Beautiful Stranger” though, that song is dope – definitely the best thing that ever came out of Austin Powers. Also, I don’t think ever posted these remixes (which I snagged off a CD single) so yay surprise new music.

Tomorrow is D through….D.

There’s a joke there about me having a lot of D but I’m tired.

Posted in B-sides, Madonna, remixes | 1 Comment »

Highlights of Pet Shop Boys, in Alphabetical Order (Day 3)

April 13th, 2014

I’m writing this at work. Blogging in a suit is weird. I feel like I should be writing about the stock market or something.

Pet Shop Boys
One More Chance (New Remix ’86)
Opportunities (Let’s Make Lots Of Money) (Reprise)
Opportunities (Let’s Make Lots Of Money) (Original Dance Mix)
Rent (The Francois Kervorkian Remix)
Was It Worth It (12″)
Was It Worth It (Dub)
West End Girls (Extended Dance Version)
West End Girls (Dub)
What Have I Done To Deserve This (Dub Mix)
Where The Streets Have No Name (I Can’t Take My Eyes Off You) (Extended Mix)
You Know Where You Went Wrong (Rough Mix)
I may have organized these Pet Shop Boys posts in alphabetical order, but it’s pretty obvious that the best is the last. I guess the Pet Shop Boys’ best tunes just coincidentally all start with letters in the tail end of the alphabet. Go figure.

Amazing remixes of “Rent” (probably my second-favorite remix of all-time FYI), “West End Girls,” “Opportunities,” and “Where The Streets Have No Name?” No way I can pick a favorite. Sure, the “Rent” remix is one of my favorite remixes of all-time, but I think that “West End Girls” and “Opportunities” are both better (and certainly more fun) tunes.

I plan on getting at least two more posts up this week, and they’ll probably be the Madonna reposts, as they’re already organized and ready to go. So strike a pose.

 

Posted in Pet Shop Boys, remixes | 1 Comment »

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