I’m going to have to change the subtitle of my blog. Because the more 12” remixes I post the less this becomes a place for “forgotten or overlooked recordings”. I’ll think of something incredibly witty and appropriate over the weekend most likely. Or I’ll just eliminate the subtitle all together and be all mysterious and shit.

Modern English
I Melt With You (Bass Meltdown Mix)
I Melt With You (Stop The Radio Mix)
I have so many damn remixes of this song that I’m spreading them out over a couple of days. These are from the 12” single of the 1990 version of the song.

Laibach
Die Liebe
Die Grosste Kraft
German industrial rock for people that think Nitzer Eb is too upbeat. These tracks were taken off of a 12” single that I couldn’t figure out the name of.

Fine Young Cannibals
Ever Fallen In Love (Extended Version)
I’ll take covers that should have never been attempted for $500, Alex. Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh but I’m not the biggest fan of FYC and the original version of this song by The Buzzcocks is one of my all-time favorites, it connects with me in ways that are way to personal and complex for me to explain here. I’m on a quest to collect every cover of this song. As of right now I have versions by Anti-Flag, Pete Yorn, Novelle Vauge, Thea Gilmore, Anorak and this one. Who am I missing?

I’m going to refrain from insulting any of my loyal fanbase tonight. I am in a good mood for some strange reason and I don’t feel like bitching and moaning – yeah, I know, I’m surprised too. Before I forget I’d like to recommend an album that came out this week. It’s Myths Of The Future by Klaxons. These British dudes are at the forefront of a ridiculously titled movement that NME dubbed ‘New Rave’. I don’t know what the fuck that means, but if you like dance and punk then you should check it out. They remind me of LCD Soundsystem but with more actual singing.

Cornershop
Brimful Of Asha (Norman Cook Full Length Remix)
Brimful Of Asha (Mucho Macho Bolan Boogie Mix)
Easy Winners (Part 1)
Easy Winners (Part 2)
I remember when this single first came out. It was pretty big in America but they fucking loved it in England I’m told. I still regularly see When I Was Born For The 7th Time on various “Greatest Of All Time” lists – so maybe one day I’ll get off my ass and actually buy the record. These mixes and b-sides came off a white-label promo. The radio edit of the Norman Cook (AKA Fatboy Slim) remix has been on a few compilations, but I’ve never seen this full-length version anywhere. The mucho macho mix isn’t as good as the Norman Cook one but it gets bonus points for the T-Rex references. The ‘Easy Winners’ tracks are only available on Cornershop singles and holy shit are they trippy.

Devo
Disco Dancer (12” Version)
Disco Dancer (Bonus Beats)
Holy shit great minds think alike. I was already planning on posting these two tracks this week and lo-and-behold, Lost In The 80s has an entire post on the song! He only put up the single version though, these are remixes that were on the 12” single. The 12” version is available on the reissue of Total Devo.

Simple Minds
Dont You (Forget About Me) Long Version
A Brass Band In African Chimes
I expected for extended mix of ‘Dont You…” just to have 8 minutes of the dude going “la la la la” over and over again, but it’s not – it’s actually just 2 more minutes of the “hey hey hey HEY!” When I was a little kid I loved this song but hated The Breakfast Club. Then when I was a teenager I loved that movie but hated this song. Now I’m pretty much sick of both. I’m convinced that The Breakfast Club is my generation’s The Big Chill and unless you are of the age that the movie is about you hate it. Of course if I ever like The Big Chill regardless of my age I’ll pull a Kevin Costner in that movie and off myself (and then get edited out as as a form of pity by the writer/director get put in a shitty western). Anyways…’A Brass Band’ is half a really good song and half incredibly annoying, because it keeps fading in and out (on purpose) so you think it’s over about three or four times before it’s actually over!

I mentioned it before but I’ll say it again to avoid further confusion. A few to the tracks I’ll be posting over the next few days will still be affected by the ‘monofuck’ as it has been come to be known. As for one commenter’s ‘stereofuck’ I do not notice any such effect. Of the tracks I’m posting tonight, I think only a couple of the Husker Du tracks are in the accidental mono. If anyone notices anything sounding funky with the stereo tracks (aside from the usual problems you get from old vinyl records) let me know. I would prefer you email me though if possible. Email addy is on the sidebar. I think everything sounds fine now, but I think we’ve collectively determined I don’t know shit!

Pearl Jam
Come Back (Live)
The B-side to the 45 of ‘Life Wasted’. I hate it when PJ uses live tracks for B-sides, especially since every single concert they perform now is for sale at their website. Since two of their biggest hits were B-sides (‘Yellow Ledbetter’ and ‘Last Kiss’) you’d think they’d release more studio cuts as b-sides.

The Pretenders
Porcelain
Cuban Slide
Precious (Live)
These songs were taken off an EP that was appropriately titled Extended Play. Porcelain eventually showed up on CD last year when they re-released The Pretenders’ self-titled debut as a two-disc deluxe edition. The version of ‘Cuban Slide’ that is on that two-disc set is a little different than this one I think. I don’t know if this amazingly kick-ass live version of ‘Precious’ ever materialized elsewhere.

Husker Du
Everytime
Helter Skelter (Live)
All Work And No Play
I remember a Wayne’s World special on MTV where Wayne and Garth made a list of band names that sounded like diseases. The only two from the list I remember are Husker Du and The Dave Clark Five. That’s a great bad joke. These are some B-sides to singles I picked up a few days ago. Everytime is off of the single to ‘Could You Be The One’ and has never made an appearance on a proper Du CD other than a rushed live album. The other two tracks are from the ‘I Don’t Want To Know If You Are Lonely’ 12-inch. The latter of the two is over eight minutes long, which I must’ve made it a great song for college-rock DJs to play when they had to use the can or score weed. The punk rock DJ at my school had an NOFX track for that.

Nothing tonight but artists I’ve already posted songs by before. I’m going to have to start expanding my musical horizons or this blog is going to become the “KLF, Depeche Mode and New Order Blog.”

Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but whatever.

The KLF
All Bound For Mu Mu Land
Make Mine A “99”
Stand By The Jams (Featuring Miss Tammy Wynette)
Let Them Eat Ice Cream
I’ve been looking for this single for a very long time and was elated to finally find it at that record show last weekend. The idea of The KLF collaborating with Tammy Wynette always intrigued me and the final product between the two does not disappoint. Essentially a remixed version of ‘Justified & Ancient’ (as are all of these tracks) it shows that there was room for down-home country in Mu Mu Land…whatever the fuck that is.

Was (Not Was)
Tell Me That I’m Dreaming (Traditional Remixed Version)
Tell Me That I’m Dreaming (Souped-Up Version)
Out Come The Freaks (Extended Version)
Man, these guys were weird. This stuff is strangely dated and ahead of its time all at once.

Debbie Harry
Backfired (Extended Version)
This was a single off of Harry’s solo debut Kookoo. I’ve never given Kookoo a listen, most people I know that have say that it peaks with with its great H.R. Giger cover art and goes downhill from there. This track is fun but also comes off as an obvious attempt to recreate the magic from’ Rapture’.

Okay, so some stupid worthless piece of shit is has a bot set up to spam my comment section with rants about how 9/11 was a conspiracy. This person can fuck off and die. If anyone sees a comment like that here please email me right away so I can burn it in the fires of Mount Doom. Anyone who posts comments telling me how right this guy is will also be put on my list of people who will face thy wrath.

That is all. Now enjoy the music.

Wow, so it turns out I’m an idiot. I long suspected as much but I got confirmation today via a comment:

…why mono and not stereo?…

I always thought my recordings were in stereo. Turns out they aren’t. Turns out when I hooked up my new turntable I crossed two wires. Not the RCA ones (I’m not THAT stupid) but the cables going to my external soundcard. In my defense those cables are not marked at all, they are just green, beige and black with no labels on them (thanks Alienware). So yeah, everything I’ve recorded since the beginning of the year has come out mono. Thankfully, only one of you noticed. I’m not going to re-record them because quite frankly, I don’t care that much and I already re-recorded a ton of crap I had once due to The Great Hard Drive Crash of ’07.

Sigh.

At least the same comments section proved that I’m not the only idiot:

I have been hunting for a Devo song for years – it appeared in the movie Tapeheads in the 80’s. It’s the “Swedish” version of Baby doll. I’m not sure if you take requests but this would be a great one to put up.

I’ve warned you all twice now. From now on any requests like the one above will by severely mocked…and then mocked once more.

I recorded these before I discovered the monofuck up (wow, monofuck is an awesome word), so don’t bitch about it.

Red Hot Chili Peppers
Give It Away Now (12” Mix)
Give It Away Now (Rasta Mix)
If You Have To Ask (Disco Krisco Mix)
I can’t do that thing that he does with his tongue. No, not that thing, I can do that just fine (you know what I mean ladies, you know…meh, forget it). I’m talking about that rolling thing he does. That’s so cool. I can’t even pronounce my Rs, let alone roll them – or any other letter for that matter.

Prince
17 Days (The rain will come down, then U will have 2 choose. If u believe look 2 the dawn and I shall never loose.)
It took me longer to type that title than it did to listen to the fucking song. This is the B-side to ‘When Doves Cry’.

Madonna
Vogue (12” Mix)
Vogue (Bette Davis Dub)
Vogue (Strike-A-Pose Dub)
And now as part of my continuing effort to make my blog FABULOUS here are some classic Madonna tracks.

I went to a record show this morning and picked up some pretty killer shit. There wasn’t a lot of 80s stuff there unfortunately but I still was able to make out with some nice 12” singles – you’ll be slowly seeing them on the site over the next week or two.

I’ve been noticing a theme in my comment section of late that I really have to nip in the butt right now. Don’t ask me if I have a certain song by Your Favorite Artist – because I probably don’t. I think some people imagine I’m sitting on a throne of 12” singles and I casually pull one out from under my ass and put it online. Everything I have (that isn’t easily available on CD) eventually makes it here. f I don’t have it I’m not going to buy it just because you want it. So, to sum up…don’t ask me for Pat Benatar singles, go to eBay.

Devo
The Theme From Doctor Detroit
The Theme From Doctor Detroit (Dance Mix)
Luv-Luv
Q: Are We Not Men? A: We Are Dan Aykroyd!
Doctor Detroit came out on DVD last year sometime and I really have to get around to watching it. It stars Dan Aykroyd as a college professor who is conned by a bunch of high-class call girls and their pimp (Howard Hesseman!!) into helping them escape the clutches of an evil mob boss by appearing as the pimp’s made-up associate, Doctor Detroit. Oh, and James Brown is in it too. Strangely, the movie is set in Chicago. ‘The Theme From Doctor Detroit’ is only available on Devo’s greatest hits collection, the dance remix and ‘Luv-Luv’ are a lot harder to come by.

Kraftwerk
The Telephone Call (Remix)
House Phone
Der Telefon Anruf (German Version)
This is the only band nerdier than Devo. ‘House Phone’ is a strangely-named remix of ‘The Telephone Call.’ All three mixes are worth downloading in my opinion.

The Other Two
Tasty Fish (Pascal Mix 12”)
Tasty Fish (O.T. Mix)
Stephen Morris and Gilliam Gilbert of New Order are The Other Two. This song by them is probably one of the catchiest tunes I have ever heard. I don’t think it’s about a particularly delicious mackerel, however.

I’m putting up some old-skool rap in celebration of Grandmaster Flash & The furious Five getting in the Rock N’ Roll Hall Of Fame earlier this week. I miss the old-skool rap sound and not just because I could never get behind hardcore gangsta rap lyrics. I think that artists like Public Enemy, Slick Rick and the immortal Run DMC had more style and pure rhyming skills than anyone since. Besides, rap songs about fucking bitches, shooting motherfuckers and getting rich are getting real old. I also miss the time when the MC and DJ mattered more than the fucking producer.

Jaz (Featuring Jay-Z)
Hawaiian Sophie (Punch It Mix)
Hawaiian Sophie (Sophie’s Mix)
Hawaiian Sophie (Hula Dub)
Pumpin’
Proof that everyone has to start somewhere, this forgotten single from “The Jaz” is the first record ever to feature Jay Z (credited here as Jay Zee). But get your hopes up for some amazing old-skool prequel to ‘Hard Knock Life’ as The Jigga makes little more than a one-line cameo in each of these songs. At least the record features that amazing picture of Jay Z sporting the fade and that totally not-garish-at-all gold rope chain. I hope no one from Rockafella comes to whack me for putting that picture up. Silly as it is ‘Hawaiian Sophie’ is actually a pretty good tune and is definitely one that’ll be stuck in your head for a while. It’s sure as hell better than ‘Show Me What You Got.’

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince
Girls Ain’t Nothing But Trouble (Radio Mix)
Girls Ain’t Nothing But Trouble (Instrumental Mix)
Girls Ain’t Nothing But Trouble (Def Mix)
Girls Ain’t Nothing But Trouble (Def Beat)
This was the duo’s very first single, released on Word-Up Records months before they were signed to a major label (the song also appeared on their first major label record Rock The House). Will Smith used to get a lot of flack from ‘hardcore’ rappers over his family-friendly lyrics and goofy style but I think his early shit was more ‘real’ than 90 percent of the gangsta crap that came out around the same time. Listen to ‘Summertime’ and try to tell me that track still isn’t one of the all-time greatest party jams. Even if you think Smith’s rhymes are corny and dated, you can’t knock the amazing turntable skills of DJ Jazzy Jeff. The Def Mix features some especially well-done scratches.

I like to write a little something before I get into the songs. Sometimes I can relate it to the music I’m posting, which is nice and convenient. Usually it’s just random bullshit and complaining. Usually I sit down in front of my computer and start typing the first thing that pops in my head, then I delete that because it’s usually a hate-filled manifesto that’ll get me put on some sort of government list. Then I try again and it’s usually some stupid trite shit that no one but my mom would care about….

And then there’s the times where I got nothing to say but I just feel like killing time while I wait for the songs to upload to my server…

Prince
She’s Always In My Hair (New Mix)
U Got The Look (Long Look)
Housequake (7 Minute MoQuake)
She’s Always In My Hair was the B-side to ‘Raspberry Beret’ and I’m sure I never heard it before but I recognized that lyric. It was driving me nuts until I realized that Outkast sampled/covered on Speakerboxxx/The Love Below. That’s about the 20th time I’ve recognized a Prince song that I’ve never heard before because of someone else’s cover/sample that I heard first. Damn that little funky fucker gets around.

Nitzer Ebb
Join In The Chant (Burn!)
Join In The Chant (Gold!)
Join In The Chant (Lies!)
I’m a miserable bastard that hates damn near everyone on the planet, but even I think these are a bit much. Damn guys, have a cookie or something.

Robert Plant
Tall Cool One (Extended Mix)
Heaven Knows (Astral Mix)
What the fuck does “Lighten up baby I’m in love with you!” mean? How the fuck did Robert Plant go from ‘The Lemon Song’ to ‘Tall Cool One’? Who the fuck is rapping in this extended mix? And why are there random audio samples strewn about for no apparent reason? The 80s gave us so many unanswered questions…

Okay, time to kick it with some new shit. Honoring the requests was fun and all but I’d much rather listen to music I haven’t heard before instead of rehashing stuff I’ve already talked about. So anyone that sends me a request to repost something in the near future will get a serious ass-whooping by a very tall man with a very short temper (that’s me, btw). That’s not an idle threat either, I got a lot of free time with which I will hunt you down.

And now that I threatened my entire audience, here’s some good music.

Prince
Irresistible Bitch
Little Red Corvette (Dance Remix)
Raspberry Beret (New Mix)
Get funky with the sexy motherfucker! ‘Irresistible Bitch’ is the B-side to the Tipper Gore-enraging ‘Let’s Pretend We’re Married’ while these two remixes were taken off of their respective singles. These are just a few of the Prince tracks I’ll be putting up over the next few days.

Ministry
The Nature Of Love
The Nature Of Love (Cruelty Mix)
This synth-heavy dance track and its remix might not sound like the Ministry that many of you know and love, but they’re a hell of a lot better than anything on Rio Grande Blood.

Pearl Jam
Love, Reign O’er Me
Rockin’ In The Free World (Live With U2)
If you’re a Pearl Jam fan and aren’t a member of Ten Club you are missing out. Not only do you get first dibs on concert tickets to every one of their shows but you also get a bitchin’ fan club single (on vinyl) each year. I just got mine today and felt like sharing. ‘Love, Reign O’er Me’ is a cover of a song by The Who and is also on the soundtrack to that new Adam Sandler movie Reign Over Me. The B-side is a great version of ‘Rockin’ In The Free World’ with U2 from an Australia concert last year.