Archive for July, 2007

The OMG Pr0n Post!

Tuesday, July 24th, 2007

I used to work for a website that sold porno movies. It was a nightmare job that almost left me a shell of a human being. Luckily, I didn’t work with the porno on a daily basis (they also sold mainstream films) but I occasionally needed to help out in the warehouse and that usually meant pulling porno titles for orders.

Now, I ‘m not a prude and it wasn’t my first exposure to porn. Back in the 80s and 90s my dad owned a video store and I’ll admit that I occasionally was able to sneak to the “back room” and get a quick glimpse of some of the titles – the fact that VHS boxes for porn tapes were fucking huge made that a lot easier. Sow when I started this job the state of porno kind of depressed me. While I don’t remember many of the individual titles of the porno movies from my dad’s store, but I don’t recall them being horribly explicit and I also remember the box art usually being R-Rated at the most. My how things had change. The pictures on the DVD cases looked like gynecological exams and the titles were just gross “Texas Asshole Massacre”, “Cum Fart Cocktail” and “Asian Cheerleader Cavity Exam Vol. II” being a few that stand out (I am NOT making any of those up). The closest thing I saw to a clever title during my time there was a tranny title called “Trans Ass Express”. (God, I’m terrified as to what Google queries my site will pop up on now).

However, I am fascinated by the brief porn chic period in the 70s when porn was almost mainstream. I love the idea of a guy and girl going out on their first date to see Deep Throat or The Opening Of Misty Beethoven. Porno was so big in the 70s that it even crossed into mainstream music with porn actress Andrea True recording the hit single “More, More More.” But that isn’t the only time that pornography and pop music crossed paths, as these tracks show.

Unknown Artist (Deep Throat I & II Soundtracks)
She’s Got To Have It
Love Is Strange
Deep Throat is the most famous porno movie of all time, so I’m not going to talk about it that much. If you’re interested in learning more about it I highly recommend Inside Deep Throat, a fascinating documentary about the making of the film and they hysteria that surrounded it. The movie makes no mention of the soundtrack though, which I didn’t even know existed until I found these tracks on some MP3 blog a year ago. These aren’t your basic “ba-chicka-wa-wa” porno tunes but they are pretty funky. Can someone explain to me the bubble sounds at the end of ‘Love Is Strange’? Is that supposed to be a bong?

Marilyn Chambers
Benihana
She might not be as (in)famous as Deep Throat‘s Linda Lovelace, but Marilyn Chambers helped usher in the era of porn chic also with her starring role in the 1972 hardcore classic Behind The Green Door (link is work safe). She was actually such a big star by the end of the decade that she decided to leave pornography to make ‘legit’ films, and in 1977 she starred in Rabid, a great horror flick by David Cronenberg. It must not have panned out though, because that was her only mainstream acting role, and she went back to porn before the decade was over. However, while she was trying to make it as a mainstream actress she was also trying to make it as a pop singer with this single. It was her only song, which is a shame because it’s not that bad (as stupid disco songs go). However, if ever heard a girl make the noises Marilyn does at the end of this song I’d call the fucking cops.

Traci Lords
Sunshine
You Burn Inside Of Me
I met Traci Lords once at a comic book convention in Novi. A friend of mine wanted her autograph for one of his friends (so he says) and I shelled out the 20 bucks for one. She seemed pretty nice and actually talked to the people that waited in her line. In front of me in the line was a creepy looking dude wearing a Star Trek: TNG captain’s uniform and sweating profusely. When he finally got to the front of the line he didn’t want her to sign anything, he just wanted to shake her hand, saying that he was “a big fan of all her work” which translated to “I own child pornography.”

Obviously, some people really love Traci Lords, but others don’t (my dad calls her “That bitch who cost me a thousand bucks”). Traci didn’t get into porno until the 80s so she missed the porno chic movement, but she was easily the biggest star in adult video at the time…too bad she was only 15 at the time. When her age was discovered all of her flicks instantly became illegal and video stores like my dad’s had to pull them off the shelves. Since then she’s become an almost legit actress, having small parts in films like Blade and Virtuosity. She’s also occasionally flirted with music too, releasing one techno album in 1995 and this single some 10 years later. Listen to ‘Sunshine’ and you’ll discover that she isn’t half bad. Listen to ‘You Burn Inside Of Me’ and you’ll find out she isn’t half good either.

Serial Killer Bus Drivers Rock Out

Saturday, July 21st, 2007

Let’s get some business out of the way first. A blog directly linked to my files again. Which I fucking hate. Unlike the asshat douchebag that did it before the people at this blog copped up to it and removed the link right away. I’m going to chalk that one up to innocent ignorance and not prickery. I’m also not really mad at them because it’s a great blog with an awesome name: The Music Slut. Check out sometime, it has a good balance of news, MP3s and random funny shit.

Pearl Jam – Live At The Academy New Year’s Eve 1992
It’s funny, Pearl Jam is by far my favorite band in the world but I’ve only posted tracks by them three times. How much do I like Pearl Jam? I have every single one of their studio albums, almost all of their singles on CD and vinyl, the import version of Ten with bonus tracks, three of their albums on vinyl, and over 30 of their “official bootlegs” most of which I bought from the Ten Club fan site store, which I am a member of. I have also seen them live five times, and three of those concerts were over the course of two weeks. So yeah, I’m a bit of a fan.

The real funny thing is that I wasn’t that big a Pearl Jam fan until about 2000. I owned most of their studio album (if you were a teenager when Ten came out I believe you were issued it along with a pair of Doc Martens and a flannel) but I lost interest in the band around the same time everyone else did. Then I bought one of their live albums on a fluke and the next thing I knew I was hooked. I can’t even explain it, but there’s something about Pearl Jam’s live music that gets under my skin and makes me believe that rock and roll can really change the world.

Anyways, now I’m rambling. This live record was a gift to fan club members who pre-ordered their excellent self-titled album last year. It’s a fun artifact from the time period, and includes some tracks that the band rarely plays live anymore, such as ‘Oceans’ and a really bizarre almost punk version of ‘Wash.’ There’s also a hysterical rant by Eddie in which he bashes Marky Mark for not being a real artist! Also worth mentioning is the inclusion of the ultimate Pearl Jam B-side ‘Dirty Frank,’ which is the best funk song about a serial killer bus driver you’re ever likely to hear.

Enjoy this classic live set. Hopefully I’ll be putting up more Pearl Jam in the future…I only have 2275 Pearl Jam songs in my MP3 collection.

Speed Wash
Sonic Reducer
Why Go
Even Flow
Alone
Garden
Daughter
Dirty Frank
Oceans
Alive
Leash
Porch

By the way, Pearl Jam just released the excellent 7-disc, three-concert collection Live At The Gorge. Even if you’re just a casual fan of the band I suggest it because it serves as a great introduction course to some of the magic you might experience at a Pearl Jam concert.

The WTF Post?

Tuesday, July 17th, 2007

This shit is so weird that I don’t know if anyone but me will really dig it, but I found both of these records to be so strange that I had to share them. I can also find next to no info on either of them, so any help by my fellow record geeks would be greatly appreciated.

Confidential All-Stars
It’s Dead Jim (Extended Radio Mix)
It’s Dead Jim (Club Mix)
It’s Dead Jim (Vocal/Perc. Mix)
How can all-stars be confidential? Sadly, that paradox is the least-strange thing about this amazingly bizarre record. If the title already didn’t give it away for you, this strange dance track is an ode to Star Trek’s Dr. “Bones” McCoy and his famous catchphrase. The song itself is pretty out there , and sounds vaguely reminiscent of early Was (Not Was), which is something I never thought I’d say. I Googled some of the “All-Stars” names and didn’t find much about them. I did find out the song’s main writer, one David Huxen, was in an obscure 70s rock band called Lift and then went on to found his own New Age recording studio (and somehow turned Native American and changed his name to “Junius” in the process). The “McCoy” of the record is John Hammond but I don’t think its the same one that won a Grammy and is the son of the legendary music producer.

Snatch
Another Brick In The Wall
This is a disco version of the iconic Pink Floyd song about the dangers of the British public school system. Because nothing says “lets dance” like institutionalized child abuse! This was a single released by Millenium Records, who was no stranger to disco remakes as they were the label of disco-remake artist extraordinaire Meco (the guy that did the Star Wars disco albums). Meco did a disco version of The Wizard Of Oz also. That is the gayest record I own (and I own two dozen Erasure singles). Maybe Snatch is a pseudonym of Meco! That would be awesome…I guess.

The Post With An Unholy Cover Of Tutti Frutti

Saturday, July 14th, 2007

The weird shit that you can find on soundtracks to obscure movies never ceases to amaze me. Most recently I found the soundtrack to Party Party, a forgotten 80s teen flick about (surprise) a party. I can find absolutely no information about it online so if anyone knows anything about it please comment. It certainly had a decent soundtrack though, with some odd ska-tinged covers of classic tunes,and some appearances by some very noteworthy 80s artists that you might not expect.

Time for a track-by-track rundown.

Elvis Costello – Party Party
I wonder how they convinced Elvis to contribute a title track to this flick? They obviously didn’t try very hard because as early-80s Elvis Costello tracks go this is pretty weak. This is on a couple of compilations but probably not any endorsed by Costello.

Dave Edmunds – Run Rudolph Run
Don’t know much about Dave Edmunds, other than the fact that he was in Rockpile. This cover of the Christmas classic is on about 80 billion Christmas compilations.

Altered Images – Little Town Flirt
Another band I don’t know shit about, although they sound kind of like a Siouxsie & The Banshees lite, so I might check them out sometime. This is a cover of a song made famous by Del Shannon and I don’t think it was ever released on any other album.

Bad Manners – Yakety Yak
I know Yakety Yak, but I’m not very familiar with Bad Manners and other than their contributions to the soundtracks of Dance Crazy and this movie I know nothing about them. Not really my style of music for the most part, but this is a fun cover and it’s never been released on anything else to my knowledge.

Sting – Tutti Frutti
Okay, this is just retarded. In the 90s a compilation album of Sting’s contributions to soundtracks was released (more on that in a bit) and this song was one of the only ones that wasn’t put on it. Listen to it, there’s a good reason why.

Bananarama – No Feelings
This is a cover of The Sex Pistols’ classic. Let me say that again, this is Bananarama covering the motherfucking Sex Pistols. It’s pretty much ‘Cruel Summer’ with the lyrics of ‘No Feelings’ put in. Rhino tacked this lovely little number on the deluxe edition of their first album, Deep Sea Skiving.

Madness -Driving In My Car
An odd song (even as Madness songs go), but there’s nothing really spectacular about it. It’s also on a quite a few Madness compilations so it’s not rare either.

Modern Romance – Band Of Gold
I’ll be honest, I never heard of Modern Romance until about five minutes before I began typing this sentence. Thanks to the glory of the interwebs, I can tell you that they were fairly big in the UK for a few years in the 80s and that Morrissey really hated them. After searching on Youtube for a bit I’ve discovered that I did know one of their songs ‘The Best Years Of Our Lives’. I didn’t like it then and I’m not a fan still. And anytime I hear the song title I think of the horribly depressing movie of the same name, which doesn’t make the song any more enjoyable. ‘Band Of Gold’ has always been one of my biggest guilty pleasures though, and they do it justice.

Bad Manners – Elizabethan Reggae
More Bad Manners, this track is on one of their rarities compilations. Why does this song make me want to smoke pot?

Pauline Black – No Woman, No Cry
Pauline Black was the lead singer of The Selecter, another ska band that’s on the soundtrack to Dance Crazy. This is a cover of the Bob Marley classic and isn’t available elsewhere.

Sting – Need Your Love So Bad
This one I have heard before, because in addition to being on the soundtrack to Party Party, it’s on that compilation of soundtrack tunes that I mentioned before. I don’t own that album, but for some strange reason my mom does and I’m assuming that’s why it sounds familar to me. It’s a good bluesy tune but it is pretty out of place considering what else is on this record.

Midge Ure – The Man Who Sold The World
Even more out of place is this spaced-out cover of the David Bowie classic by the lead singer of Ultravox. I think there are more synthesizer and vocal effects on this track than every other song on the album combined. Midge’s released this song a few times on various greatest hits compilations, but it appeared on this soundtrack first.

Chas And Dave – Auld Lang Syne
Another act I know nothing about. It is strange though that this is the second cover of Auld Lang Syne I’ve put up in less than a year. To my knowledge this track isn’t on any other album either.

The Smashing Assholes Post

Wednesday, July 11th, 2007

So I pathetically caved in and picked up the new Smashing Pumpkns album yesterday. Shockingly it’s not that bad, but it still pales in comparison to great Pumpkins classics like ‘Siamese Dream’ and of course ‘Melon Chollie’. It does sound like Smashing Pumpkins though, which isn’t to surprising since the band was pretty much a Billy Corgan solo project from the get go. Supposedly Corgan is one of the great control freak assholes of rock music. Spin magazine described him best when they compared him to John Fogerty, saying that he was a real rarity in pop music, a control freak that knew what the fuck he was doing. This post is dedicated to two of the biggest self-centered pricks in music, Corgan and the granddaddy of asshole bass players Roger Waters. And before anyone asks, the only reason there isn’t a CCR track here is because I don’t have any.

Smashing Pumpkins
Zeitgeist
Death From Above
Terrapin
I have previously voiced my disdain for Billy Corgan “reuniting” the Smashing Pumpkins without half of the original line-up and I’ve also frequently posted on how much store exclusive tracks piss me off. So when it was announced that The Smashing Pumpkins’ newest album would have not one, not two, but three different bonus tracks depending on where you bought it, I was a little miffed. Moves like this completely confuse me. Do record labels really think that their customers are going to shell out the money to buy the same album two or three times? It’s not like the exclusive tracks aren’t going to end up on Limewire. Especially when one is an iTunes version that sounds shitty and is crapped-out with DRM? This trend also pisses me off because it serves as a complete “fuck you” to independent record stores, who almost always get screwed out of deals like this. It’s like they’re daring us to to play fair and buy the album legally. Here are two of the three bonus tracks from various versions of the Pumpkins’ latest, as well as a live cover of the Syd Barrett track ‘Terrapin’ thrown in because I couldn’t find the iTunes exclusive track.

Pink Floyd
Pigs On The Wing (8-Track Version)
The Hero’s Return (Parts 1 & 2)
Roger Waters’ reputation of being a complete and total prick to all those around him is well documented so I’m not going to go into it. These two tracks come from latter-day Waters-era Pink Floyd, when the band was much less a band and more of a way for Waters to release his solo material. The first track is a version of ‘Pigs On The Wing’ that combines both parts 1 and 2 into one track. Supposedly this is because the technical limitations of 8-track players wouldn’t allow for them to be separate. The two tracks are bridged together with an awesome solo by Snowy White, the ridiculously-named guitar player from Thin Lizzy who toured with Pink Floyd during the late 70s. The extended version of ‘The Hero’s Return’ is from the single for that song. The song itself is off of The Final Cut, a Pink Floyd album in name only, as Roger Waters had complete control by then. It was the last album with Waters and if you ask me its for good reason, to date its the only Pink Floyd album I’ve sold back to the record store (and I own the fucking soundtrack to More).

The Big Gay Remix Post

Tuesday, July 10th, 2007

This will be my last all-remix post for a while. I got some weird/cool/rare shit that actually isn’t remixes! These are the last of my Erasure mixes (until I find more) and I have nothing to say about them, so enjoy! I might have another post later tonight if I feel motivated for a change.

Erasure
Don’t Say Your Love Is Killing Me (Jon Pleased Wimmin’ Flash Vocal)
Don’t Say Your Love Is Killing Me (Tall Paul Mix)
Don’t Say Your Love Is Killing Me (RH Factor Vocal Club Mix)
I Love Saturday (Beatmasters Club Mix)
In My Arms (Love To Inifinity Stratomaster Mix)
In My Arms (Love To Infinity Gyrator Club MIx)
In My Arms (Crumbling Down Mix)

The Worst Post Ever!

Friday, July 6th, 2007

I’m a huge fan of Best Week Ever, both the TV and the blog and I was made an even bigger fan of them when they linked to me earlier this year. That being said, this post at their site by Dan Hopper really pissed me off.

I do agree that needless reunions by classic bands can do nothing but taint (hehe, I said taint) their musical legacy. I also agree with most of the bands on their list. What really bugs me about the list is that Hopper obviously didn’t know shit about the bands he was mentioning.

For example, he says this about The Sex Pistols’ 1996 reunion:

…what the hell were they going to play live anyway? All the songs off Never Mind the Bollocks in a different order, with “My Way” thrown in?

First of all, it’s hard to accuse a band’s reunion of being cheap and meaningless after they already admitted the same. Secondly, why would The Sex Pistols cover ‘My Way’? Sid Vicious covered that song, not The Pistols. At least the writer was correct in saying that the original line-up was the one that toured (a lot of people assume Sid was part of the original line-up).

He said this about The Eagles’ ‘Hell Froze Over’ tour:

Can you really say “Hell has frozen over” if it’s something no one gives a sh*t about?

I really hate The Eagles and I always will (ironically I love Joe Walsh and can tolerate Glenn Frey, but that’s besides the point). However, to say that no one gives a shit about them is just ignorant, they do have the best-selling album in history after all.

They also knocked Flock Of Seagulls for getting back together, which would’ve been fine if they didn’t help facilitate their reunion on VH1’s shitty ‘reality’ show Bands Reunited! (And by the way, if you want an idea of how bullshit that show was, check out this first-hand account of it by Information Society’s Kurt Harland).

But the comment that really sent me off was the one he made about The Doors:

Here’s a great idea – take a band whose only bit of intrigue is their lead singer’s tumultuous, unpredictable stage presence and reunite them thirty-one years after his death (also thirty-one years after the band broke up, coincidentally).

I’m not a big fan of The Doors, I’ve always thought they were a little bit pretentious and way overrated but even I knew that wasn’t true. The Doors released two albums after Jim Morrison’s death. Of course, they aren’t the world’s most well-known records, but that’s what the internet is for.

Google, motherfucker! can you use it?!

Sigh, anyways this glaring error has forced me to temporarily delay my next post of remixes in order bring light to post-Morrison Doors. Released the same year as Morrison’s death, 1971’s Other Voices was Robby Krieger, Ray Manzarek and John Densmore’s attempt to continue The Doors’ legacy minus their legendary frontman. Probably knowing that no one could replace Jim Morrison, they instead continued as a threesome with both Robby Krieger and Ray Manzarek share vocal duties on the album to varying degrees of success. While the record isn’t a masterpiece it does deserve to be given a second chance and be released on CD, something which still hasn’t happened in America. In fact The Doors seemed to have disowned the album (and the one that came after it, 1972’s Full Circle) even failing to include it on the deceptively titled box set The Complete Studio Recordings.

Here is the complete album so you can decide for yourself. If you only want a sample I suggest downloading Ship W/ Sails (which has a bitchin’ organ solo) the groovy ‘Tightrope Ride’ and ‘I’m Horny, I’m Stoned’ simply because it’s called ‘I’m Horny, I’m Stoned.’

The Doors – Other Voices
In The Eye Of The Sun
Variety Is The Spice Of Life
Ship w/ Sails
Tightrope Ride
Down On The Farm
I’m Horny, I’m Stoned
Wandering Musician
Hang On To Your Life

The Return Of The Giant Depeche Mode Post

Sunday, July 1st, 2007

Who likes depression, heroin and synthpop? I do!

These 20-plus songs put the number of Depeche Mode songs I’ve featured here well over 50! What’s really crazy is that before I started this blog I wasn’t the world’s biggest Depeche Mode fan. It’s really amazing what a dozen or so 12” singles will do to your taste in music. Now I can’t go a day without feeling a need to ‘Shake The Disease’.

Below is every single Depeche Mode song in my collection or rarities and remixes that I had not yet posted. To make things a little easier I have separated them by single and they are in chronological order.

My Monday post is going to be a slight detour away from the recent remix purge, but I should have the long-promised Erasure remixes up very soon.

The Meaning Of Love 12” Single (West German Version)
The Meaning Of Love (Fairly Odd Mix)
Oberkorn (It’s A Small Town) (Development Mix)

Love, In Itself 12” Single
Love, In Itself 3
Fools (Bigger)
Love, In Itself 4

Shake The Disease 12” Single
Shake The Disease (Remixed Extended Version)
Flexible (Remixed Extended Edition)

It’s Called A Heart 12” Single
It’s Called A Heart (Extended Mix)
Fly On The Windscreen (Extended Mix)

I Feel You 12” Single
I Feel You (Helmet At The Helm Mix)
I Feel You (Afghan Surgery Mix)
I Feel You (Throb Mix)
I Feel You (Babylon Mix)
I Feel You (Life’s Too Short Mix)

Goodnight Lovers 12” Single
When The Body Speaks (Acoustic Version)
The Dead Of Night (Electronicat Remix) – This is totally the best remix of anything ever.
Goodnight Lovers (Isan Falling Leaf Mix)

Precious 12” Single
Precious (Full Vocal Mix)
Precious (Michael Mayer Balearic Mix)
Precious (Motor Mix)
Precious (Misc. Crunch Mix)