Don’t Cross The Streams

Wow, so it turns out I’m an idiot. I long suspected as much but I got confirmation today via a comment:

…why mono and not stereo?…

I always thought my recordings were in stereo. Turns out they aren’t. Turns out when I hooked up my new turntable I crossed two wires. Not the RCA ones (I’m not THAT stupid) but the cables going to my external soundcard. In my defense those cables are not marked at all, they are just green, beige and black with no labels on them (thanks Alienware). So yeah, everything I’ve recorded since the beginning of the year has come out mono. Thankfully, only one of you noticed. I’m not going to re-record them because quite frankly, I don’t care that much and I already re-recorded a ton of crap I had once due to The Great Hard Drive Crash of ’07.


At least the same comments section proved that I’m not the only idiot:

I have been hunting for a Devo song for years – it appeared in the movie Tapeheads in the 80’s. It’s the “Swedish” version of Baby doll. I’m not sure if you take requests but this would be a great one to put up.

I’ve warned you all twice now. From now on any requests like the one above will by severely mocked…and then mocked once more.

I recorded these before I discovered the monofuck up (wow, monofuck is an awesome word), so don’t bitch about it.

Red Hot Chili Peppers
Give It Away Now (12” Mix)
Give It Away Now (Rasta Mix)
If You Have To Ask (Disco Krisco Mix)
I can’t do that thing that he does with his tongue. No, not that thing, I can do that just fine (you know what I mean ladies, you know…meh, forget it). I’m talking about that rolling thing he does. That’s so cool. I can’t even pronounce my Rs, let alone roll them – or any other letter for that matter.

17 Days (The rain will come down, then U will have 2 choose. If u believe look 2 the dawn and I shall never loose.)
It took me longer to type that title than it did to listen to the fucking song. This is the B-side to ‘When Doves Cry’.

Vogue (12” Mix)
Vogue (Bette Davis Dub)
Vogue (Strike-A-Pose Dub)
And now as part of my continuing effort to make my blog FABULOUS here are some classic Madonna tracks.

10 Responses to “Don’t Cross The Streams”

  1. Anonymous says:

    you’re blog has ALWAYS been FABULOUS (and you too, but not in a gay way. unless you are gay. in which case in a gay way. a good gay way. meh… forget it)

  2. Briefs29 says:

    I agree with kate, your blog is utterly fabulous. unless you’re straight, in which case it’s…whatever straight people call things that are fabulous. groovy? do they still use that word?

  3. Anonymous says:

    The RHCPs 12” posted here also appears to be recorded in mono.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Ha! Monofuck. What a riot.

    My new word of the day.

    Who cares? It’s still good music.

    Did I say thank you for sharing?

  5. Cygnet Committee says:

    Thanks so much for the Madonna mixes! That’s a bonus for me.

  6. Anonymous says:

    ok, mock it all you want. So what. The reason I want the song is because it’s hilarious.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Maybe this makes me an idiot too, but why is the Devo request idiotic?

  8. randy says:

    Uh yes I’m looking for the 12″ remix to the Eurythmics song (I Love to Listen to) Beethoven… Can you find it for me and post it here please? I don’t have the time or the inclination to get off my bony ass and find it myself. Thank you very much. I’ll check back in a day or two and hopefully it will be here for me.

  9. Anonymous says:

    bite me Ran

  10. Anonymous says:

    I noticed the monofuck but was too lazy to tell you – although now that I’m typing I may as well offer you something of a nod.

    The “monofuck” is somewhat nasty.
    A stereo file with both channels fed by either a doubling of the left or right source.

    L + L (or R + R) feeding L + R

    There’s also the “stereofuck” when one of your cables is earthing or our of phase, and the whole recording sounds ‘underwater’, sounding whack.

    -L + L (or -R + R) feeding L + R

    Both are ghastly in a song with panning production elements!

    Try any stereo Beatles track for the full monofuck effect.

    Posting mp3s in acutal mono, or the coined “monofuck”, may help as a ‘technicality’, if you get into a wrangle with RIAA.

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